Posted on May 12, 2023
Military spouses often feel overwhelmed and alone. A new pilot program aims to help
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Day-to-day instability is pushing many spouses of active-duty military members to a breaking point.
Even women who grew up in military families, as self-described Army and Navy brats, say they did not realize what they were signing up for when they began to juggle the pressures of life as a military partner.
They face obstacle after obstacle — from struggling to secure a job to finding child care — because they constantly uproot their families as military assignments change.
When Elisa Borah’s husband was deployed to Iraq for 15 months in 2006, she juggled caring for her two young children alone while also attending graduate school.
“I did my best to find close relatives and other friends and family to help out during that time,” she says. “I remember the thing I most wanted help with — and this sounds kind of strange — was just someone to watch the kids while I went to the grocery store by myself and could just do some adult tasks that I needed to get done.”
Borah is now the director of the Institute for Military and Veteran Family Wellness, a joint initiative of the Dell Medical School Department of Health Social Work and the Steve Hicks School of Social Work at The University of Texas at Austin. Her latest effort is a new pilot program that aims to connect military families with resources and peer support.
Even women who grew up in military families, as self-described Army and Navy brats, say they did not realize what they were signing up for when they began to juggle the pressures of life as a military partner.
They face obstacle after obstacle — from struggling to secure a job to finding child care — because they constantly uproot their families as military assignments change.
When Elisa Borah’s husband was deployed to Iraq for 15 months in 2006, she juggled caring for her two young children alone while also attending graduate school.
“I did my best to find close relatives and other friends and family to help out during that time,” she says. “I remember the thing I most wanted help with — and this sounds kind of strange — was just someone to watch the kids while I went to the grocery store by myself and could just do some adult tasks that I needed to get done.”
Borah is now the director of the Institute for Military and Veteran Family Wellness, a joint initiative of the Dell Medical School Department of Health Social Work and the Steve Hicks School of Social Work at The University of Texas at Austin. Her latest effort is a new pilot program that aims to connect military families with resources and peer support.
Military spouses often feel overwhelmed and alone. A new pilot program aims to help
Posted from wbur.org
Military Family
Family
Spouses
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 3
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My wife was overwhelmed at times and I know it...but being the solid gold rock anchor that she is, she hid it and made it happen. There aren't many that can do that but I will say that the srongest people I have ever met in my life are military spouses. When their spouse deploys they become mom, dad, taxi, homework guru, lawn care specialist, mechanic for cars and appliances, nurse, and all of that on top of regular household duties. For me deploying was a tough assignment but mentally not as challenging as having to take on two roles and keep things going. Then when the member comes home having to relinquish some of that which they had control over for the past 12-18 months is difficult. I can see how a lot of marriages fail...sometimes the burden is just too much,
Lt Col Charlie Brown LTC Trent Klug MSgt John McGowan Cpl Vic Burk Sgt (Join to see) CWO4 Terrence Clark CPL Douglas Chrysler SGT Jim Arnold MSgt James Parker LTC Stephen F. SGT Steve McFarland SGT Mark Anderson SMSgt Lawrence McCarter CMSgt (Join to see) SPC Gary C. COL Randall C. Sgt (Join to see) LTC David Brown
Lt Col Charlie Brown LTC Trent Klug MSgt John McGowan Cpl Vic Burk Sgt (Join to see) CWO4 Terrence Clark CPL Douglas Chrysler SGT Jim Arnold MSgt James Parker LTC Stephen F. SGT Steve McFarland SGT Mark Anderson SMSgt Lawrence McCarter CMSgt (Join to see) SPC Gary C. COL Randall C. Sgt (Join to see) LTC David Brown
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LTC Trent Klug
Lt Col Scott Shuttleworth Both my ex and current wife had issues but they powered on through them and, in the end, were rock stars while I was gone.
I did have Soldiers and Marines who had young wives who really sank while we were gone. The Emergency Relief folks were the rock stars for them
I did have Soldiers and Marines who had young wives who really sank while we were gone. The Emergency Relief folks were the rock stars for them
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We all know military life requires a lot of sacrifice for both the member and their family. Any kind of program that help the military family with the demands of military life, is a good thing.
Being a Navy brat, I always thought life was good with my parents and siblings. We moved a lot, but I never had issues making new friends or adjusting to a new location. I didn't realize the stress that moving puts on a family or child, until I was the member, and was moving my kids every three or so years. My oldest had a difficult time, because she didn't like change, she wasn't socially outgoing, so making new friends was difficult for her. On a positive side, once she had a circle of friends, those connections were unbreakable, until it was time to PCS. I always felt like I was the worse father in the world, for making her relocate against her will.
However; my wife is a Rock Star and foundation of our family, and was able to be that "anchor" that the kids could rely on.
Being a Navy brat, I always thought life was good with my parents and siblings. We moved a lot, but I never had issues making new friends or adjusting to a new location. I didn't realize the stress that moving puts on a family or child, until I was the member, and was moving my kids every three or so years. My oldest had a difficult time, because she didn't like change, she wasn't socially outgoing, so making new friends was difficult for her. On a positive side, once she had a circle of friends, those connections were unbreakable, until it was time to PCS. I always felt like I was the worse father in the world, for making her relocate against her will.
However; my wife is a Rock Star and foundation of our family, and was able to be that "anchor" that the kids could rely on.
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