Posted on Jun 21, 2022
9 Things That Can Help When You're Feeling Hopeless
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Lt Col Charlie Brown Link is broken.
Oh, the irony. Having a bad day? Try this link....
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Oh, the irony. Having a bad day? Try this link....
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These are great for down days and for self-help.
But in my experience, do NOT try to use these to help someone else, ESPECIALLY if they are not just down or having a bad day. If someone is legit depressed and you try to use these methods EXTERNALLY, you come across as a condescending a$$.
Reason why? Look at #1 on this list..... Depression lies. But since it is our own brain lying to us, it is VERY convincing. And also very defensive. And the #1 defense, which you will NOT likely be able to overcome is along the lines of "you have no idea what I am going through / what my life is really like; therefore you have no idea how wrong what you are saying is."
I am not saying not to help people you care about who may be depressed. But be VERY careful about trying to convince them life isn't that bad. They have to convince themselves. If you push too hard, you get tossed in the bin of "people who don't really know me, and think I am not good enough."(Otherwise why would you be trying to change me?). And the bigger that bin is, the more isolated I become. And it is just more "proof" that I have little value - or no value. If even my closest "friends" and family keep telling me I am not good enough, then why do I even bother trying? Trying to achieve, trying to fit in.... Trying to live. Because some days, just staying alive is a humungous effort.
But in my experience, do NOT try to use these to help someone else, ESPECIALLY if they are not just down or having a bad day. If someone is legit depressed and you try to use these methods EXTERNALLY, you come across as a condescending a$$.
Reason why? Look at #1 on this list..... Depression lies. But since it is our own brain lying to us, it is VERY convincing. And also very defensive. And the #1 defense, which you will NOT likely be able to overcome is along the lines of "you have no idea what I am going through / what my life is really like; therefore you have no idea how wrong what you are saying is."
I am not saying not to help people you care about who may be depressed. But be VERY careful about trying to convince them life isn't that bad. They have to convince themselves. If you push too hard, you get tossed in the bin of "people who don't really know me, and think I am not good enough."(Otherwise why would you be trying to change me?). And the bigger that bin is, the more isolated I become. And it is just more "proof" that I have little value - or no value. If even my closest "friends" and family keep telling me I am not good enough, then why do I even bother trying? Trying to achieve, trying to fit in.... Trying to live. Because some days, just staying alive is a humungous effort.
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