Posted on Oct 10, 2023
Suicide Prevention and Mental Health: How Finding a Community to Serve With Saved My Life
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In honor of World Mental Health Day, I’d like to share how I found my way out of the dark to a place of peace and happiness.
I served 21 years as an infantryman in the Army, filled with purpose and a clear mission. When I medically retired from the Army in 2016, I soon learned that the uniform had also become part of my identity. The transition to civilian life was not what I expected. It was hard. There was no fanfare. One day I was a soldier and the next day I wasn’t. Without the constant source of confidence from a mission and the camaraderie and community of a team, I started to lose myself. The isolation, the disconnectedness, it all put me on a path to a very dark place where I was spiraling out of control.
On a whim, I signed up to volunteer with Travis Manion Foundation (https://rly.pt/TMF). I was shocked by the people I met there – other veterans like me, other people who had or were still fighting battles like the one I was currently fighting. I felt a ray of hope, even though I was still struggling.
As time went on, the connection I felt with the TMF community changed me. The dark place didn’t go away immediately though. There were a couple of times I felt like I was physically standing on a cliff with my toes over the edge, and honestly, if it weren’t for people from TMF calling me and checking on me, I wouldn’t be here today.
Little by little, as I began to feel part of a community once again, the darkness began to subside. I took advantage of every opportunity I could find to connect and grow with TMF. I participated in a 7-month program aimed at helping me learn what I was most passionate about and how I could apply that as a leader out of uniform. I trained to become a mentor to youth through the Character Does Matter program and found a sense of purpose that I thought I’d lost.
I discovered many of the youth in my community are walking a similar path to the one I experienced as a kid. They come from families who have fallen on hard times or are trying to find their way out of poverty. Being able to show them there are people out there who care, people like me who came from the same place, but found success through positive influences in my own life, has been a major part of my healing.
I had missed that feeling of making a difference, and showing up for youth in the same way a community of veterans did for me, it’s an experience that words cannot describe. The community I’ve found has taught me that I can help people, even out of uniform. I can be part of the good. Now I know that I am so much more than a “soldier.”
If you are struggling in the way I was, try not to judge yourself for having these thoughts; they don't define you. Reach out to someone you trust, whether it's a friend, family member, or mental health professional, and share what you're going through. Finding my purpose and becoming part of a community has been a lifeline for me. Through shared experiences and genuine connections, I've regained hope and a sense of belonging. The strength of this community has helped me overcome the isolation that once fueled my thoughts. Now, I wake up each morning with a renewed determination to navigate my journey and lend a helping hand to others who may be walking a similar path. The TMF community has been the guiding light that saved me from falling into despair and, for that, I'm eternally grateful.
If you’re in need of a community, you can join TMF here: https://rly.pt/TMFJointheMission
I served 21 years as an infantryman in the Army, filled with purpose and a clear mission. When I medically retired from the Army in 2016, I soon learned that the uniform had also become part of my identity. The transition to civilian life was not what I expected. It was hard. There was no fanfare. One day I was a soldier and the next day I wasn’t. Without the constant source of confidence from a mission and the camaraderie and community of a team, I started to lose myself. The isolation, the disconnectedness, it all put me on a path to a very dark place where I was spiraling out of control.
On a whim, I signed up to volunteer with Travis Manion Foundation (https://rly.pt/TMF). I was shocked by the people I met there – other veterans like me, other people who had or were still fighting battles like the one I was currently fighting. I felt a ray of hope, even though I was still struggling.
As time went on, the connection I felt with the TMF community changed me. The dark place didn’t go away immediately though. There were a couple of times I felt like I was physically standing on a cliff with my toes over the edge, and honestly, if it weren’t for people from TMF calling me and checking on me, I wouldn’t be here today.
Little by little, as I began to feel part of a community once again, the darkness began to subside. I took advantage of every opportunity I could find to connect and grow with TMF. I participated in a 7-month program aimed at helping me learn what I was most passionate about and how I could apply that as a leader out of uniform. I trained to become a mentor to youth through the Character Does Matter program and found a sense of purpose that I thought I’d lost.
I discovered many of the youth in my community are walking a similar path to the one I experienced as a kid. They come from families who have fallen on hard times or are trying to find their way out of poverty. Being able to show them there are people out there who care, people like me who came from the same place, but found success through positive influences in my own life, has been a major part of my healing.
I had missed that feeling of making a difference, and showing up for youth in the same way a community of veterans did for me, it’s an experience that words cannot describe. The community I’ve found has taught me that I can help people, even out of uniform. I can be part of the good. Now I know that I am so much more than a “soldier.”
If you are struggling in the way I was, try not to judge yourself for having these thoughts; they don't define you. Reach out to someone you trust, whether it's a friend, family member, or mental health professional, and share what you're going through. Finding my purpose and becoming part of a community has been a lifeline for me. Through shared experiences and genuine connections, I've regained hope and a sense of belonging. The strength of this community has helped me overcome the isolation that once fueled my thoughts. Now, I wake up each morning with a renewed determination to navigate my journey and lend a helping hand to others who may be walking a similar path. The TMF community has been the guiding light that saved me from falling into despair and, for that, I'm eternally grateful.
If you’re in need of a community, you can join TMF here: https://rly.pt/TMFJointheMission
Edited 11 mo ago
Posted 11 mo ago
Responses: 12
Your story resonates for me. In my case the community is the American Red Cross and we have a lot of veterans who are a part of it.
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PO2 Kelsey Martin
Its so interesting how Veterans have the need to continue to serve. At the moment I am a helper in my son's boy Scout troop. I really do see how the benefit of helping others helps us as well.
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Brother I’m glad you found a group to help. I believe that the transition from soldier to civilian is hard on all of us, I spent 27 yrs in the army and my wife is still currently serving going on 34 yrs, I have my demons from the service and from higher ranking personnel. It’s a daily fight, I’ve tried the suicide route twice and was unsuccessful thank god, but I found the Elks to be a great source and outlet for myself and my family, I joined an elks lodge in Texas and it’s based on two things ? Founded for veterans and raising money for special needs. There are peer groups within the elk lodges everywhere in the United States and it’s a great way to hang out with senior service members before my time and those that are currently serving or just got out, having an outlet is the greatest part of the organization, I found with rally point and the elks I’m just as happy as I was in the service
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I adopted a 3 legged cat from spca. She has 3 good legs and I have 1 useful one. I use her for a heating pad on the other. If I'm feeling edgy I just ask.. who will feed the cat?
I'd post a picture if I could
Some folks arent real sociable but Volunteerism can be a lot of things.
I'd post a picture if I could
Some folks arent real sociable but Volunteerism can be a lot of things.
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