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Command Post What is this?
Posted on Oct 31, 2014
RallyPoint Team
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Responses: 40
LTC Hillary Luton
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I think as a society, we have transitioned to a point where we spend so much time bending over backwards trying to please everyone, that we have forgotten how to make people earn little things like respect. I see too many people of all ages who expect respect like its air. There are also too many who don't believe they should give respect to others who have earned it.

And the problem is not just with subordinates giving respect to leaders. Respect goes both ways. After working for not one, but two bosses who have no concept of respect, I know first hand how frustrating this can be. Unfortunately, these are two men who spend all of their time kissing butt and trying to make themselves look good, and are more than willing to do so by throwing their subordinates under the bus.

I have always like a saying by Jaime Escalante. If you are not familiar with the name, please go rent the movie Stand & Deliver (1988). In the movie when the other teachers say the students can't handle the harder math assignments, Jaime replies with, "A student will rise to the level of expectation." We see this all of the time in the military. When the bar is set higher, we rise to reach it. The bar of respect has been set so low, its means little. Maybe its time to set that bar up high again. Instead of letting everyone get away with complaining about minor details in order to advance in their careers, we start making people earn the respect they expect to receive and in turn teach others how to give respect when its earned.
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PO3 Anthony Farhner
PO3 Anthony Farhner
10 y
Respect-you get what you give.
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PO1 Jeff Doan
PO1 Jeff Doan
>1 y
I agree with the "Respect should be earned" theory! My dept head (a former AF Capt) is under the impression that he should be respected because of his position. He has proven that he has little or no respect for his subordinates, so why should he receive respect?
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MAJ Monique Salinas
MAJ Monique Salinas
>1 y
LTC Hillary Luton Ma'am, I agree. It does go both ways. Soldiers are craving to respect the individual, not only the rank. I understand when they say they don't feel respected, they are referring to respecting their level of responsibility, their age, and their experience (occupation as a civilian). I don't look at rank, I see everything else beyond that and hold them to the standard of their level of responsibility. Should they exceed the standard, I am confident to assign them to greater levels and challenging assignments.
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SGT Bryon Sergent
SGT Bryon Sergent
>1 y
PO1 Jeff Doan, yes the person deserves respect for the position they have attained, but you don't have to respect the person holding it. I was always taught respect the rank. It is vital for good order in the military. But because they are a bad leader, no. Put it in your tool bag and use it to shape yourself into the leader you DON'T want to be.
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COL Jason Smallfield, PMP, CFM, CM
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Good question/comments. I would argue that respect has not lost its meaning but rather we as a society are individually and collectively failing to adhere to the standards of respect for a variety of reasons:
- Respect not enforced by parents as in days prior. Kids will do what their parents enforce both as young kids but also later in life as adults when no one in authority is there to see it.
- Helicopter parents leading to kids who do not know/understand responsibility at a young age (not my fault I am disrespectful, it is because of X in my childhood).
- Fear of "offending" somehow leading to lack of calling someone out when needed or calling things as we see them (Fort Hood as workplace violence rather than terrorism).
- Growth of Internet leading to decrease in personal connection and growth in anonomity. Therefore people doing person to person what they do on the net.
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CPT Pedro Meza
CPT Pedro Meza
>1 y
I agree with SSgt Alexander about it being a self inflicted, but will point out that we have become a reflection of the reality TV personalities, we have become a society that is self pleasing and self observed and that has has given us a false sense of having the right to say and do as we please. The sad part is that when questioned we are quick to respond with the our Constitutional Rights but fail to make use of them during election time as represented by voting participation.
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CPT Ahmed Faried
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Respect is in deeds and words. I generally give everyone the benefit of the doubt and treat them as I would like them to treat me.
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SGT Bryon Sergent
SGT Bryon Sergent
>1 y
Again we get away from times before. Everyone doesn't like when people quote Christianity but the golden rule is " Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you!"
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