Where can I find the regulatory guidance for the proper way for a commissioned officer to address an NCO?

This response is purely opinion but ill share it none the less. An officer knows he outranks his NCO's. I have found that when an officer used my first name it was a sign of trust. In todays army theres a rift between the officers corp and NCO corp more often than not. I don't think every fine detail should constantly be scrutinized unless your loosing face with your troops.

As leaders, you will have to issue orders which may put personnel in difficult if not life threatening situations. If you personalize a subordination that removes the objective aspect of leadership. Professionalism must be maintained and I agree with LTC Curlee's statement whole heartedly.

Probable under the UCMJ. I would think.

While in uniform, In the Army or Marines and Air Force, the proper way to address anyone is by their rank and last name. Sgt Jones, Lt Smith. in the Navy (and Coast Guard) it would be Petty Officer Jones. Cdr Smith. Off duty, it all depends on the relationship of the people involved.

I always told my soldiers and officers that they could call me anything they wanted as long as they put SGT in front of it. It got the intended results.

I always said my first name is SGT. My last name is Fridley anything else is not Professional. Does this officer allow the NCOs to address him by his first name? I am guessing probably not.

Couldn't go wrong with using rank and last name to address I'd think. I think it's common to use Sergeant to all that it applies to at E-5 and above in Army. Not sure about the rest i.e. 1stSgt, SgtMaj as it applies to Army. Courtesy and respect apply also because they've earned it. The Bill, Bob, and Joe thing depends on unit & individuals I guess but I wouldn't think it would be common practice. The USMC Officers do that a lot but only senior addressing junior or equals in rank. Not a good idea for a Lt to address Bn Cmdr by first name unless he tells you to, which I've never seen. He's the boss though and whatever he wants, you give. Small and remote units might be less formal such as Spec Ops, small detachment like embassy duty, in academia etc.

Wow, I guess I must be one of the few that didn't think that an officer using my first name was degrading, fraternizing, or disrespectful when being spoken to. Guess I had too much of a mellowed out personality in that regard. Had a LTC that I was assigned as a driver for who asked my name and I gave the standard my name is Specialist to which he grinned and asked what my real name was. When it was just he and I, he was "Sir" and I was "John" in other company I was Specialist Wingfield.either way there was no disrespect up or down.

First off, tell your NCO,s to grow some , if if the officer calls them " John" then he also gets called John . as for you looking for "regs" you need to grow some also and quit feeling inferior.

There are specific times and circumstances that customs and courtesies can be relaxed, but only when both parties agree to that. ALWAYS use rank/name when subordinates or leaders and peers from other units are present. Professional military respect is our "payback" for the hard work and training we do, and it is expected of all of us; especially our leaders. Just do it!