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I asked a former female Marine if she had experienced an overwhelming amount of sexual harassment/assault while she served in the Corps. To my extreme surprise this was her response (paraphrased of course):
No. No, not at all. One time I was in the barracks and a guy in my unit snuck into my room and tried forcing himself on me. I started screaming and within a few seconds this whole crowd of Marines came barging into my room and carried him off. They’re my brothers, why would they let anyone hurt me?
Now THAT is honor and loyalty.
This brought tears to my eyes for two reasons.
Reason One: I was so overwhelmed and happy these Marines heard a fellow Marine in trouble and they came running to her rescue. There was no hesitation, no passive intervention and no second thoughts. That's just mind-blowing to me.
Reason Two: My mind was blown because very rarely has a male Soldier stood up for me like that. Matter of fact, I rarely hear any male Soldiers stand up for women like that.
I was raised where men watch their mouths around women, men hold open doors for ladies, and men take out the trash while women wash the dishes. I understand and learn more every day how the military is far from being the Southern paradise where knights in shining armor rescue damsels in distress. I also understand some women don’t like being treated that way. Roger, tracking.
Maybe those Marines who busted in her room didn’t care that she was a woman, they just heard one of their fellow Marines in trouble. Regardless of why, their actions and her response portrayed a very different world from what I know in the Army and that saddens me.
Is it sexist for me to expect male Soldiers to stand up for female Soldiers? Maybe so.
Is it too much to ask for Soldiers to stand up for Soldiers, regardless of gender? I don't think so.
No. No, not at all. One time I was in the barracks and a guy in my unit snuck into my room and tried forcing himself on me. I started screaming and within a few seconds this whole crowd of Marines came barging into my room and carried him off. They’re my brothers, why would they let anyone hurt me?
Now THAT is honor and loyalty.
This brought tears to my eyes for two reasons.
Reason One: I was so overwhelmed and happy these Marines heard a fellow Marine in trouble and they came running to her rescue. There was no hesitation, no passive intervention and no second thoughts. That's just mind-blowing to me.
Reason Two: My mind was blown because very rarely has a male Soldier stood up for me like that. Matter of fact, I rarely hear any male Soldiers stand up for women like that.
I was raised where men watch their mouths around women, men hold open doors for ladies, and men take out the trash while women wash the dishes. I understand and learn more every day how the military is far from being the Southern paradise where knights in shining armor rescue damsels in distress. I also understand some women don’t like being treated that way. Roger, tracking.
Maybe those Marines who busted in her room didn’t care that she was a woman, they just heard one of their fellow Marines in trouble. Regardless of why, their actions and her response portrayed a very different world from what I know in the Army and that saddens me.
Is it sexist for me to expect male Soldiers to stand up for female Soldiers? Maybe so.
Is it too much to ask for Soldiers to stand up for Soldiers, regardless of gender? I don't think so.
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 196
SSG V. Michelle Woods,
I think your final question "Is it too much to ask for Soldiers to stand up for Soldiers, regardless of gender?" best sheds light on the issue and our failure as an organization to foster the proper mentality. Look at how we speak- "female soldiers, male soldiers, etc." Remove the adjective from the daily lexicon, and begin to remove it as a way to differentiate soldiers. We don't say "black soldier" as a means to differentiate, why should we say "female soldier"?
Soldier is the proper noun, let's begin to use it for everyone the same a way Marine refers to another Marine.
Thank you for bringing this up. Now that we have welcomed females into the artillery world I can help lead by example in my unit and help foster a positive environment.
I think your final question "Is it too much to ask for Soldiers to stand up for Soldiers, regardless of gender?" best sheds light on the issue and our failure as an organization to foster the proper mentality. Look at how we speak- "female soldiers, male soldiers, etc." Remove the adjective from the daily lexicon, and begin to remove it as a way to differentiate soldiers. We don't say "black soldier" as a means to differentiate, why should we say "female soldier"?
Soldier is the proper noun, let's begin to use it for everyone the same a way Marine refers to another Marine.
Thank you for bringing this up. Now that we have welcomed females into the artillery world I can help lead by example in my unit and help foster a positive environment.
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CW3 (Join to see)
Males get raped in the military too. This has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with exerting unjust and unlawful restraint and dominance over another person. Exactly right when noted above "we don't say Black Soldiers, nor should we say Female Soldiers." This is the dual-standard writ large, and EXACTLY why there should be one, and only one standard. One PT standard, one marksmanship standard, one eff-ing standard. You wanna Soldier, then shut up and Soldier. The Major who unloads round after round into the clearing barrel should have been restrained and court-martialed on the spot for deadly negligence. The Jumpmaster who put jumpers out of a Blackhawk backwards should have been restrained and court-martialed on the spot, same reason. Why do you suppose these things DON'T happen? All this crap is connected in the big picture.
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SSG (Join to see)
I think your statement is the perfect example of "one team one fight." I hope that more leaders, through all the branches, pick up on this mentality. I know that is how I treat all my soldiers and any other service member I interact with. It doesn't matter if you are different gender or ethnicity. I would hold a door open or protect any one of them.
Glad to see other strong competent leaders in the Army.
Glad to see other strong competent leaders in the Army.
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CWO3 (Join to see)
Good point. I remember well when our Marines were called another name but Marines. It shouldn’t make any difference what gender, race, color or creed you are. You are a professional Soldier, Marine, Sailor, Airmen, Coast Guardsmen. Don’t forget our past history of our military personnel. We maybe from different eras but we’re all from the same cloth as our forebears. Respect, Duty, Honor, Country, and God comes with being in our Armed Forces,
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Thank you everyone for your feedback. The reason this may come across as one-sided in favor of the Marines is because it is my story, which stemmed from a conversation I had with one Marine female. She told me her story and this was my reaction due to my own personal experiences with several chains of commands and several soldiers. Of course it's one-sided. It's my story.
It doesn't mean there are no bad Marines. It doesn't mean there are no good soldiers.
It does however, represent the mindset I believe we should all share: we have to look out for one another with a level of loyalty that has the power to stomp out these slackass service members infecting our ranks.
It doesn't mean there are no bad Marines. It doesn't mean there are no good soldiers.
It does however, represent the mindset I believe we should all share: we have to look out for one another with a level of loyalty that has the power to stomp out these slackass service members infecting our ranks.
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SGT (Join to see)
She said, "No. Never," despite the fact that a Marine from her unit snuck into her barracks room with the intent to assault her?
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SFC (Join to see)
We are all soldiers, regardless of rank, race, gender, religion or whatever. We all decided to raise our right hands in defense of our nation and ask for nothing in return. We have all learned that no matter how much discipline a unit has, there is always going to be one or two who cant differentiate between the streets and the military. Those who make it that far, bring with the them the criminalistics ideals that they can get away with whatever they want. It is bad enough we have to look out for each other down range, but if you cant trust that soldier in garrison, there is no way in hell I would trust that person in combat.
As mentioned in the comments, the words female or male Soldier, Marine or whatever, needs to be removed from the picture completely. We are all one team and fight for the same genuine purpose. We shouldn't have to worry about whether or not Pvt. Numbnutz is going to rape or sexually assault someone. The military, as well as the civilian world, is full of potential predators who are looking for victims. As long as we all care enough about our brothers and sisters, we can do our best to ensure that the idiot doesn't strike.
As mentioned in the comments, the words female or male Soldier, Marine or whatever, needs to be removed from the picture completely. We are all one team and fight for the same genuine purpose. We shouldn't have to worry about whether or not Pvt. Numbnutz is going to rape or sexually assault someone. The military, as well as the civilian world, is full of potential predators who are looking for victims. As long as we all care enough about our brothers and sisters, we can do our best to ensure that the idiot doesn't strike.
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FWIW, I would suggest that the title of this thread should be "The Marines defend each other."
Because really, those Marines were just defending one of their own, not simply reacting because she was female. As a Marine, she was statistically more capable of defending herself than the average American civilian victim of sexual assault, but she still needed help, and her comrades stepped up.
This should happen not only in the Marine Corps, but in ALL branches of the military. Heck, ANY person in the USA should be able shout for help and have everyone within earshot come running to help.
Make it happen, America!
Because really, those Marines were just defending one of their own, not simply reacting because she was female. As a Marine, she was statistically more capable of defending herself than the average American civilian victim of sexual assault, but she still needed help, and her comrades stepped up.
This should happen not only in the Marine Corps, but in ALL branches of the military. Heck, ANY person in the USA should be able shout for help and have everyone within earshot come running to help.
Make it happen, America!
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SGT (Join to see)
Absolutely, 1LT Nick Kidwell! So many of these insightful, empathetic comments come from vets. From a purely sociological and/or psychological aspect...why is that? Did you feel that way when serving? I'm not being patronizing, just wondering why it's that way...
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1LT Nick Kidwell
Well, I can only speak for myself, but I don't think I have a great deal of insight or empathy...I'm just trying to be a decent human being. My civilian work background may have something to do with it, I might be better able to see the forest for the trees as compared to when I was in, and I don't have any fear of bending the noses of higher ranking persons because...well, rank matters not to a vet. :)
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PO2 Molly Burton
Raised in the 60's or not PO2 Terry Proctor, I agree with you that there is no room for people who commit these acts, and I set that standard to those who harm males and females. I understand there will always be someone bigger and badder than you...as I have been told, but that is why more people that know the right thing to do it too stand up against it. Not be create an environment where it is joked about and taken for granted. Marines have a culture and expectation that I think is taken more seriously than almost any other branch of the military. I wish that could be easily said for the other branches.
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