How have you dealt with PTSD?

I was a surgical tech stationed at a FOB in Afghanistan. Although I was never in combat, I worked on all the guys. I feel as if I shouldn't have a problem dealing with it since I was never outside the wire, but eight years later I still am having nightmares and get very little sleep. I've never gone to see anyone about it hoping it would just resolve itself someday. I feel guilty feeling the way I do since so many people had a way, way worse experience than I had.

What I am learning is when folks land on their feet, it varies from person to person.

I had to find a way to root myself at "home," rather than in combat. Time, treatment, and creative outlets worked for me -- in my case, I learned how to cook. The best part of that kind of therapy session is being able to sit down to a good meal at the end of it (or go out to a restaurant if something went horribly wrong). I had to go through multiple therapists until I found the one that could actually help me, but once I had him, it worked -- I still use the techniques he taught me to keep myself on an even keel, and the last time I saw him was almost four years ago.

The hardest part of dealing with PTSD for me was recognizing the new normal that was my life. After my experiences, I wasn't the same person, and I needed to understand and come to terms with that development (and the sense of loss). Creative outlets seem to work for most of my colleagues and I - learning a new skill, or returning to one that you'd put on the shelf. I have found that it certainly helps to be able to build or develop something.

Lastly, being able to talk about it is crucial. I'm not ashamed of having been diagnosed with PTSD. I consider it a normal reaction to abnormal circumstances, and after multiple deployments, I've racked up a lot of abnormal circumstances. While there is still a stigma around it (because the healthy will always feel a little uncertain about the wounded), it is becoming less so, and helping our brothers and sisters in arms to deal with these issues gets them back into the fight that much more quickly, because they have people around them to rely on.

Every damn day of my life, so far!

Still dealing with it...

They call what I have an Adjustment disorder. Not sure their basis for labeling it that. More of 'I have serious issues with unethical leaders in our military disorder' and it stresses me to death that none of the systems work to stop these leaders from hurting our troops. Doesn't help that some of these leaders were directly responsible (in my opinion) for one of the kids on my team killing himself. Also, doesn't help that I went from a high deployment tempo at Fort Bragg where our main concern was bringing people back alive to an environment like Hawaii where the leaders are selfish pricks that play mind games to torment soldiers and don't seem to care at all about their wellbeing.

How I deal with PTSD. One day at a time, moment to moment, Yoga, walking, deep breathing, Have a WRAP plan, family, 2 labs, and having Faith in God and Jesus Christ.

One arduous step at a time, then the realization I will always be different.

When I wake up I do not think sore subjects. I stay numb a lot so I don't spiral out of control.

Avoidance has been my tool. I am one who has always buried everything deep down and I have always kept my emotions to myself. The problem is that it by burying it down it likes to bubble up and rear its ugly head, sometimes in situations where a breakdown is not exactly appropriate. It may not be the healthiest thing, but I have become quite the homebody. I avoid crowds, so grocery shopping is out of the question, unless its midnight. I avoid debris on the side of the road and larger trucks, so driving is difficult. But the biggest thing that helps when things are turning dark is my wife and my 5 kids. My wife knows when I need to be picked back up, and if I cant be, she is there to keep me in check or to listen to me. I may not say much, but she is always there to listen.