Posted on Mar 25, 2014
What's the hardest part about coming home from a deployment?
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I'm a young soldier on his first deployment. At times I find myself wondering what challenges I might face when attempting to pick up where I left off. For example returning to garrison, my wife, my friends etc.
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 10
My best advice Sir pertains to your wife. She has been doing everyhting on her own the last 12 months and don't need you to come home and tell her all the things she did wrong (she probably already knows). She likely changed as did you over the year you have been gone. She may not be the same person because of that so, sometimes it takes a little getting use to when you get back. But there are agencies everywhere and if you find yourself in the position to need them, don't be too proud to seek their help,
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SFC (Join to see)
SFC Gilley is correct. I would also say don't jump into everything at once. Ease back into it. When I returned from my last deployment I let her continue on as if I was still gone and slowly started picking up some of my old things I did around there. I also made sure I let her know how much I appreciated her.
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Sir,<br><br>I don't know how much this pertains to you, being that you're a signal officer, but for soldiers who saw combat one of the hardest things is to readjust to "normalcy." A lot of soldiers take a while to come back down from their amped up combat ready state. Extreme hyper alertness, adrenaline rushes for objectively minor things, freaking out when you fail to feel your weapon pressing against your side, these are some of the things that I had trouble with when I came back to the states. The good news is that most soldiers learn to readjust within a few months. The bad news is that there isn't a whole hell of a lot you can do to alleviate the stress during this time period.<br><br>SFC Richard G. also made an excellent point considering the fact that you have a wife. The biggest mistake I've heard a lot of married soldiers make when they return from a deployment is to assume that everything will be the same when they get back. Put bluntly, it wont be. Try to figure out how your wife has been getting by since you left and work with her to reincorporate yourself into the daily routine. Don't assume that just because you handled a particular relationship role before you left that you'll be able to dive right back into it. <br><br>The best advice I can give is to take things slow, and do your best to communicate with your wife. She's not a mind reader. She doesn't know where your head is, and might even have difficulty understanding your emotional state even if she could handle that expertly before. You both are now different people, treat the situation as such and learn to re-familiarize yourself with each other. <br>
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<p>Isaac, </p><p><br></p><p>My recommendation is to be aware of your surroundings. Remember that when you return home there is no danger and there is no rush. You will be returning from a very structured environment where orders and directions are followed. You wife does not work for you. Allow her some mistakes, take things slow and thing before you react. Things that would make you upset on deployment shouldn't carry the same weight at home. Don't get mad at your wife just because she forgets something or isn't moving fast enough for you. Also, don't rush into intimacy. When you and she are ready you will know. Bottom-line, control your emotions, be aware of your surroundings and remember that you are home. After this deployment you will appreciate how great America really is. Be safe. </p>
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