Posted on May 26, 2023
SGT Team Leader
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I have a question regarding resiliency. This is mostly directed for senior NCO's (E7 and up) but anyone can answer these questions freely if they wish.

Haven't been feeling very well lately and it seems the last few months have been especially hard. One thing I struggle with more than anything is failure. How to face it, and really I suppose "Getting over it" if that makes sense. I take ownership of my shortcomings and missing the mark, but perhaps personally. Criticism I generally handle well and take it to heart.

Has anyone had difficulty with their own past shortcomings and how did you overcome those feelings of doubt? Any advice would help and be appreciated.
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Responses: 10
SGM Mikel Dawson
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Failure is stopping. If you don't make the grade the first time, then learn and go again. In my civilian job as a Farrier, I failed my first try to get my certification, but learned what I really needed to do to complete the task. Next go around, I made it. When you keep trying you have not failed. Ask yourself: Is your cup half empty or half full? My cup is always half full.
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SMSgt Lawrence McCarter
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There is only a failure if after a setback You don't rise up to either correct or not make the same mistake again. Life is a set of ups and downs for everybody but life goes on and to make it bearable You have to rise above and not dwell on the setbacks which everyone of us experience from time to time.
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CPT Staff Officer
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Failure is only relative to the amount of tries we put forth. Even video games have numerus lives.

For exampled:
I failed at my CFA exams and failed each level exam at least once. I am a CFA, and of those that start the process only 10% complete it. So regardless of how one looks at my failure along the way I'm among the 10% that finished it.

Then I raced motorcycles and finished dead last my first race, and 7 years later was starting on the front row.

I failed at becoming an officer way back in the 90's when I didn't get selected for an Academy.
Then I failed again when I tried to go OCS back in 2011, and was too old.
Then I enlisted and submitted an Officers Direct commission packet in 2013 and wasn't selected. I submitted again in 2014 (after learning the "game" and played up to seeking a commission in the most vacant MOS), and was selected.

Now, oh irony, when I was passed over trying to get an officer academy path way back in the 90s' I was pursing Logistics. Logistics is a big word, and one of the board members of the selection committee at the time asked me (only a HS kid at the time) to explain it to him (which I correctly did) Anyway, I got the congressional nomination, but not selected by the Academy itself.

Right here right now, I am a Logistical Captain.

My Drill SGT asked me rhetorically of course, why the hell would I want to be a 40 y/o butter bar. I quietly bit my lip holding my thoughts to myself:
I'm not going to be a 40 year old butter bar. I'm going to be a 60 year old Colonel.

Which in retrospect isn't going to happen. LTC probably, COL no.

You fail when you quit. The time line to success can always be pushed to the right.
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SGT Team Leader
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Very insightful story. Thank you for sharing.
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