Posted on Jun 9, 2015
SSG VNicia Young
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Grieving is normal but its vital to do so in a healthy way
Posted in these groups: Imgres Deployment
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1SG Civil Affairs Specialist
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I had a Soldier once when we were deployed to Afghanistan got the happy news his wife was in labor. We expedited his paperwork and got him moving on e-leave. As I was preparing his paperwork, I noticed the concerned look on SSG G's face. I asked him and he said, "she is only 6 months along". Uh, oh.
We got him down to the ADAG waiting for his flight.
Then a second Red Cross message came down. His wife had died during an emergency C-section. The baby was in trouble. I found the Chaplain and went with as the news was delivered mere moments before boarding a flight. No doubt, it must have been a harrowing 24 hours in the air, in the dark, not knowing all the way to Texas.

He had two weeks to make arrangements to settle his wife's affairs, plan and hold a funeral, fix a family care plan he didn't know he needed, and tend to his premature daughter hanging on in the NICU.
Realizing he needed more time, he requested an extension. It was denied. He had to return to Bagram and request a release from theater.
This was eventually granted, but you can imagine the rage. He was alternately dispondant and furious.
Eventually, he was released early and went home to tend to his family. His little girl pulled through, but had real issues that she will always have to deal with.

I lost track of him and never heard what became of the situation, but I think of him often.
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CSM Michael J. Uhlig
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Our Chaplain Corps is trained in bereavement counseling, SSG VNicia Young, I suggest you (or whomever is going through this crisis) find a Chaplain that you trust and talk with them.
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COL Jean (John) F. B.
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SSG VNicia Young

First, I am sorry for your loss.

I would recommend that you try to reach out to family by phone, if possible.

Share your grief with your friends and allow them to console you. Don't try to tough it out alone. I am sure you are with people who care for you and can offer support during your time of grief.
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