To Drill Instructors/Drill Sergeants, what's the funniest thing a recruit/cadet did or said that almost made you "break character"?

Cpl Kevin Henderson That is a good question. There are probably too many to recount. You have to remember that, at least in the Army at Fort Benning, I would see 240 Privates per cycle, and we did about 4 rotations per year for at least 2 years without a cycle break. I do remember one Private who was so bad, he couldn’t do A SINGLE SITUP on the initial 1-1-1 assessment. Another was getting smoked on day 0 and said “You do what you have to do Drill Sergeant, I’ll do what I have to.” Needless to say he almost got kicked in the face (he was in the front leaning rest.) of course he was so bad, the Chaplain was yelling at him at the obstacle course on the very first event, that he wasn’t going to make it because he couldn’t high-crawl the 50 meters to start the event without falling out. Without needing to go into detail I was standing before the Battalion Commander a couple weeks later recommending he be sent home.

Day 1 I had the males TTL because their beds were a mess and I was going to teach them how to fix it. We are in the first 72 so time hacks are big. I tell them "With both hands go rip all the sheets off your bed. You have 20 seconds, go!" In the middle of all the chaos I see this one trainee with his sheets in his mouth! I yelled WTF are you doing!? He said " I thought you said to rip the sheets in two DS" I just starred at him and then yelled "NO!!!! You rip those sheets I'm not giving you new ones the whole cycle!" It was really hard to stay mean looking because I just stood there watching him for a bit. He was hardcore gnawing on these sheets and he couldn't rip them, which is what I found funny.

Another time I did lose it because a trainee stepped into another ones poop in the field and was saying "You're going to clean my boot Green" PVT Green said "No" and they bickered for a bit.

I have too many to talk about.

One of the guys from my old unit became a drill sergeant. I made a bet I could make him laugh. He would be "in character" and I just was overly enthusiastic to do push ups (yippie, I love hazing! Oh boy, I'm gonna make my bed!) And smiling wide as he yelled. It's not the reaction that's expected so it made him laugh. Especially after I asked to sweep the sunshine off the sidewalk.