Posted on Dec 7, 2014
Dangers in telling your children explicit details of war stories!
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A parent that tell every specific and explicit details of the trauma, especially when not age appropriate, can cause the child to develop high anxiety, distress, depression and PTSD symptoms in response to the detailed images that were given.
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 13
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There's a reason most war veterans don't talk to those who haven't "been there, done that" - because there's absolutely NO point of reference for those who have never experienced the horrors to even begin to understand. Each veteran's story within them is a personal one - telling children that story when they are children is a bad idea, no matter what the shrinks, etc. say. Time and Place.
'Nuff said.
'Nuff said.
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CH (CPT) Heather Davis. Unless there is an awfully good reason to go into the details, I would keep any discussion on the most superficial level . . . and if there is a good reason to go into significant detail with someone . . . whether family member or therapist . . . I would make certain they are actively engaged with a therapist to be able to process any concerns.
Veterans who have somewhat similar experiences may be able to handle more . . . but even then one must be careful to watch their expression and listen carefully to their words for any signs of their distress. Medical procedures particularly mascal experiences may need to be shared with people who will handle similar situations but even then presentation must be carefully paced for the sake of your students. There are lessons to be learned . . . and some of those lessons are best kept for others who must assess whether they really seriously want to work in your field and to prepare for work. Otherwise I would question the wisdom of sharing any but the most superficial details. Warmest Regards, Sandy
Veterans who have somewhat similar experiences may be able to handle more . . . but even then one must be careful to watch their expression and listen carefully to their words for any signs of their distress. Medical procedures particularly mascal experiences may need to be shared with people who will handle similar situations but even then presentation must be carefully paced for the sake of your students. There are lessons to be learned . . . and some of those lessons are best kept for others who must assess whether they really seriously want to work in your field and to prepare for work. Otherwise I would question the wisdom of sharing any but the most superficial details. Warmest Regards, Sandy
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CH (CPT) Heather Davis. I do understand in principle. But, the closest I would ever get to discussing details with my own daughter would be to give her the China Beach Series . . . and ask her to watch the Through and Through Episode about PTSD effects on nurses of my generation. The likelihood of discussing triage, surgery, etc is remote. That she knows I was a nurse in a war is enough. Warmest Regards, Sandy
CMDCM Gene Treants
My father NEVER talked about his WWII experiences to us when we were children. I do remember one time a buddy of his, who was also in the Battle of the Bulge, came to our house. The kids were told to leave the area so that they could talk and we did. After his buddy left my father was morose for a while,but then got back to his normal cheerful self.
After I had been in the Navy for a few years, my dad and I had a long talk about his service and what he had seen and experienced. I then realized it was nothing he ever needed to share with a child. Combat, real combat, is something you only discuss with people on active duty or other veterans, people who can understand and not judge. After our talk I understood why he never wanted me or my brother to go into Army.
After I had been in the Navy for a few years, my dad and I had a long talk about his service and what he had seen and experienced. I then realized it was nothing he ever needed to share with a child. Combat, real combat, is something you only discuss with people on active duty or other veterans, people who can understand and not judge. After our talk I understood why he never wanted me or my brother to go into Army.
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SGT Graham "Tom" Town
I have never discussed specific details of my experiences with my Daughter or either of my Boys. There is quite enough out there, and everyone has different memories...best let them rest in peace.
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I have stories that I haven't told my WIFE yet, much less my children. I guess I am having a hard time understanding why anyone would tell all the gory details to a child. My children know I was in a war. They know it was dangerous. But they also knew that daddy was well-trained and would do the right thing.
Until they are adults or perhaps a bit earlier if they consider joining, they don't need to know much more than that.
Until they are adults or perhaps a bit earlier if they consider joining, they don't need to know much more than that.
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