Posted on Oct 3, 2014
MAJ Deputy Director, Combat Casualty Care Research Program
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As most of you know I'm not really religious, but the chaplain at our unit has become a good friend of mine and I told him this story a few days ago.

Since I was a kid I've always had issues with depression and, you might say, suicidal thoughts. But after A'stan and seeing countless soldiers, Marines, and Afghans come through missing limbs or dead I've never even thought about suicide again. I came out of A'stan with a PTSD that seems to make me cherish life even more. Every person I watched die just made me want to be around my kids.
I know we see a lot of stories about PTSD and suicide, wondering if anyone else had something of the reverse like I did... go in with issues and come out loving life even more.
Posted in these groups: 78568930 PTSDB4caadf8 Suicide
Edited 10 y ago
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Responses: 9
1LT(P) Executive Officer
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MAJ (Join to see) thanks for sharing and thank you for the time you served over there. I don't think I've ever heard a perspective like this and I'm truly happy you have been able to hunt the good stuff after your experiences. I hope that everybody who is struggling with things they have seen and experienced never forgets that we are one giant bang-bang family and we always have each other to lean on!
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1LT(P) Executive Officer
1LT(P) (Join to see)
10 y
MAJ (Join to see) find the crayons and we'll talk
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MAJ Deputy Director, Combat Casualty Care Research Program
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PO2 Heather Ashby
PO2 Heather Ashby
10 y
As to writing that book, great idea! I have a writing colleague, SSgt Shawn Garrett, USMC-ret who healed his PTSD through writing fiction. His first book releases from Jabari & Jaser publishers this month (October 2014). I feel that his words are going to help a lot of troops heal. And I'm sure yours would too. Blessings.
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PO2 Heather Ashby
PO2 Heather Ashby
10 y
Shawn Garrett's book is 500 MILES AN HOUR (From Jabari & Jaser - Oct 2014)
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HN Hba Advisor
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I npersonally haven't deployed but i have a type of PTSD from my past with what occured between me and my dad. Since joining and being with marines and listening to their stories and talking with them the same has happened to me. it's made me realize that yeah crappy stuff happens you see and have bad things happen to you but it makes you appreciate what you have in life even more.
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MAJ Deputy Director, Combat Casualty Care Research Program
MAJ (Join to see)
10 y
HN (Join to see) I closed my little brother's eyes right after he died. You never outlive those things. But now I kiss my son every day because you never know what is going to happen. Real life doesn't have a "do-over". My mom said something I always think about, as my brother was dying - "you only get to do this once, so do it right".
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PO2 Heather Ashby
PO2 Heather Ashby
10 y
Blessings to you MAJ. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
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HN Hba Advisor
HN (Join to see)
10 y
Major, I've had pretty close to the same as you except fro a brother or sister it was my mother. She passed away when i was 6 and it was only me and my sister there in her last moments. She had a brain Tumor (Gleo Blastoma) and was given 4 months to survive and survived for 4 years for me and my sister. Seeing and remembering her strength is what gave me the strength to get through what happened with my dad for myself. Thats the main reason im in the military. I had always thought about joining but was told i would never amount to anything but i followed in my mothers footsteps and never lost my strength and kept fighting for what i wanted. Now i've been in for 3.5 years and plan to make it a career.
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MAJ Cybersecurity Manager
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I know the feeling sir, I lost my brother to AIDS in 03. My first tour to Iraq was a rough one, a near miss by a sniper and a rocket attack on the ALOC on top of the everyday killing made it hard to function. I'm currently getting the help I need and I thank you for sharing your story. We often hear of the "Iron Major" but forget that we are all human!
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