How has your military service or your condition affected your romantic relationships? Do you have any dating or marriage tips?

Almost all of my close friends in the military have been divorced at least once. This career is hell on marriages - and I commend those couples that have the tenacity to make it work.

Work is work; leave it there so that when you're with your family, give them you 100% undivided attention. Continue to date your spouse and ensure you make every effort to let them know how appreciative you of them. Hard times come with this career choice, however, it's up to that married couple to figure out if they're strong enough to withstand the storm and continue to build towards the investment they put themselves into. Faith-Family-Work in that order IMHO.

The common advice I heard was to not take work home. That advice came from guys who were separated or divorced. So I took every bit of my day home. I discussed my work day with my wife and with my kids when they were old enough to be discreet. I got their advice, and whenever it was appropriate, they were in the unit area.

When I could give them a taste of the infantry way in the field, I did. My wife and kids could read a 1:50k map and use a lensatic compass with the best of them. We were allowed to frequent the firing range with private weapons off-duty at one post so the wife could qualify for expert Rifle badges if she had to.

At home I made sure my wife could do the things I did, but would miss because of deployment (from furnace pm's to tire rotation to appliance repair,) And when she was proficient at my chores, we switched, when I wasn't deployed so she was confident she could handle it all in my absence. (She maintains that I would have to go to remedial sweeping and mopping in her extended absence).

Thirty four years later, I have a great marriage. I am very close with my daughter and until he passed, I was close with my son.