I Kept My Abusive Marriage A Secret Because Marines Are Supposed To Be Tough

The thing that people fail to realize is that it always starts off subtle. It isn't so much that you don't realize you're in a bad place, it's more like you feel you have nowhere to go. By the time you realize something isn't right, they have gotten you to push away friends and family. They make you feel like you can't do any better. They isolate you in every sense of the word.

Bring a soldier, you don't want to admit that you have huge issues. You don't want to impose, you don't want to appear weak, you don't want people judging you, you don't want to upend everything when the unit is already so busy, you don't want to risk not being believed.

At the same time, many victims of abuse don't know what a loving relationship looks like, so they tolerate little amounts of abuse that increases over time, and it reinforces that view of "love."

this is not good and leads to many problems...

Another sad read but the truth. Amazing how many good people have drunk the same kool-aide as the author in explaining why and how she came to accept the ethic which prevented her from taking action for so long. She woke up just in time to save herself from being seriously injured or killed by her not so loving husband who seemed to be so great until he went horribly sour for some unknown reason. We read all too often of similar situations where one spouse ends up in a shallow grave in the desert or hidden down a deep hole. Not the way a person should end up.