Your best "oh crap" moment?

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 12 Aug 2014 22:38:01 -0400

You know what I'm talking about. That time that you saw on your phone that 1SG was calling. Or the time you were told to report to the battalion headquarters. Your stomach dropped and your palms got clammy.

Maybe it was a close shave?
Maybe you didn't shave and the division CSM noticed?

You've all got them, and we all want to learn. Or at least feel your pain.

Response by 1LT Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 17 at 2014 1:35 PM

1LT Private RallyPoint Member — Sun, 17 Aug 2014 13:35:25 -0400

When the Charge Nurse came into the OR to tell me two MP's were waiting in the corridor with orders to immediately escort me to the Base CO's office. I apparently stirred up a bit of a ruckus when I politely but firmly invited an Austrialian and his RVN protégés to leave my hospital and never darken my doorstep again. My demeanor and requests were apparently considered to be in poor taste . . . and maybe a little over the top . . . by host nation & allied command. When we arrived he poured me a drink, told me to report to an embassy liason officer for debrief, and not to even raise my voice to anyone else for the next few days . . .

Response by SGT William B. made Aug 18 at 2014 12:38 PM

SGT William B. — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 12:38:38 -0400

1SG be callin' and I'm all like

My palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on my PT's already, MRE spaghetti

Response by SGT James Elphick made Aug 18 at 2014 2:14 PM

SGT James Elphick — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 14:14:12 -0400

I have 2.

First, I had just been stop-lossed for a third deployment and was pretty pissed so my appearance was less than squared away (not out of reg's though) and I was never much of a "garri-trooper" anyway. So it's the day of the E-5 board (I had already been promoted a few months earlier) and my PSG (also not squared away on this day) sends me to represent a soldier from my team. Well of course my company 1SG and CSM notice my appearance and chastise me, but to add to that I was told to report to the battalion CSM that afternoon with my PSG and both of us had to have fresh haircuts. We get in there and CSM reams us about appearance and how we aren't SF and we still have standards. The highlight was CSM was complaining about blousing pants over boots (which was how I rolled) so I was just standing there thinking "Don't look down, don't look down". Anyway, at the end of it my PSG told me "that was a waste of an ass-chewing".

The second one was the day after my 21st birthday. I was asleep on my buddies couch and it's around 1 pm. Another friend of mine comes in and wakes me up saying the CSM (same one as above) is asking for me by name and that I was supposed to be in a meeting at 11 am (I was never informed beforehand). So I hustle and get ready and head in, assuming the worst, but there was no issue. Just had a meeting about SDNCO's while on rear d. Breathed a big sigh of relief after that one.

Response by PO1 Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 18 at 2014 2:15 PM

PO1 Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 14:15:12 -0400

September 18, 2006, Goose Creek Naval Weapons Station, Charleston, SC. It was a beautiful, windy day with a bit choppy water. I was pulling onto our pier after conducting waterborne patrol. I tried to moor (park) just behind the USCG boat that was also moored. I was riding a 'Boston whaler' small boat, almost light enough to be picked up from water by hands all together. The strong gust was blowing in my back as I was pulling in and water choppiness did not help, swishing parallel with the wind.

I thought I slowed down enough so as not to create any wakes. My partner jumped off onto the pier and attempted to tie up the boat. He wasn't strong enough as wind and current pushed the boat slightly forward. The bow (tip) brushed against USCG boat engine blocks causing only minor scratches. Coasties, who stood at the pier, looked at the scratches, shook their heads, and floated away.

20 minutes later they pull back in: Chief wants it documented. The showdown began, all units have been notified of a boat wreck, all reported down to the pier. Watch commander, detectives, USN and USCG Chiefs on scene. Both USN and USCG COs were on scene. CDO/OOD came on scene. I'm standing in the office of our division officer (LT at a time) blaming the wind and the current.

Some coasties didn't think I was coming in fast, but some did, bastards! My partner had my back because he said I came in just fine.

Long story short, detectives took my statement and watch commander advised of a possible DRB (pre-NJP) hearing. DRB never happened and I was on patrol the day after next (they were too short with qualified coxswains heh heh)

Since that moment I got tired of being afraid of people and politics. I do the best that I can, work hard, play hard, and if I mess up, well I fess up. I take it like a champ, and never have another 'oh crap' day again. Hooyah!

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 18 at 2014 2:42 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 14:42:01 -0400

Anytime my CSM sends me an email or through someone else to "come see him" its an oh crap moment lol.

Response by Sgt Andrew Pouliot made Aug 18 at 2014 2:47 PM

Sgt Andrew Pouliot — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 14:47:14 -0400

I've had a few of these moments, but this one was a buddy of mine on deployment.
We were on our last few weeks in Afghanistan, and one of our HE operators, LCpl Allday, was living it up because he had just been selected for meritorious promotion to corporal, and he had chipped a corner off his front tooth whilst doing clapper pushups in the flight terminal at Bastion.
We had just received a briefing from our command about military IDs; if we lost them, we would not be able to leave Afghanistan, and anyone who couldn't return home would have to stay with the next unit (which meant an additional 7 months in Afghanistan).
Well, one night, during operations, Allday misplaced his ID. It fell out of his pocket while he was walking across the cargo yard and the helicopter pens at Bastion. We looked everywhere for it, seeing as he had looked out for us and we didn't want him to get in trouble. He only notified our platoon sergeant when we spent hours looking for it.
We had been told that any misplaced IDs would not be replaced out here so fast, which meant during that additional time in Afghanistan you would probably get a new one. It also meant he would lose his new promotion to corporal. So we continued to look for it everywhere, but it was nowhere to be found.
When our platoon was called into battalion headquarters aboard Leatherneck, Allday was called into the CO's office by the battalion sergeant major. All of us were waiting in the hall and the sergeant major left the office door open on purpose, we figured because they were going to make an example of recently pinned Cpl Allday.
Instead, our lieutenant colonel asks Allday what happened to his ID; when Allday responded that he did not honestly know, it had been lost during work, the CO nodded and exchanged glances with the sergeant major. He then gets up and says, "well, we told you that if you lost your ID you would have to stay here" and Allday nods and says "Yes sir" and he opens a drawer on his desk and pulls out a small package, which turns out to be USMC rank insignia in a plastic box. Allday thought it was lance corporal rank, which would mean he had just been busted down on the spot, but instead, it was brand new corporal chevrons. The CO slapped them down on the desk and said, "Luckily we can get you a new ID today" and the sergeant major shook his hand and congratulated him on his meritorious promotion.
All of us were standing in the hall with our jaws hanging and eyes wider than dinner plates. The sergeant major came out and said "Good morning marines" and everyone stuttered and choked out "OORAH SERGEANT MAJOR" and he had this huge grin on his face.

Response by SSG Robert Burns made Aug 18 at 2014 3:08 PM

SSG Robert Burns — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 15:08:46 -0400

Was at the golf course and got a case of the BG's. Was literally sprinting to the nearest porta potty which was about 200 yards away. Half way there, retreat begins. The golf course was packed with military personnel all standing at attention....What do you do? Literally an "oh crap" moment.
Longest minute of my life.

Response by Cpl Dennis F. made Aug 18 at 2014 3:21 PM

Cpl Dennis F. — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 15:21:08 -0400

About July '68. I had 10 days left in country and was out chasing rocket launch sites south of Danang. I had a pick up driver from supply and as things were a bit "hot" I double cocked the .50 on the way out to Engineers. We pulled into our slot and I set up azimuths to possible launch site targets before the sun went down. I walked out on the fender to watch the sunset and heard "I wonder if I can hit the French fort from...BANG!" My pick up driver had sat down in my TC hatch and squeezed off a single .50 over my ear.
I went from rage to covering my driver in an instant as an Engineer officer came out to see what was up. "Just an AD.......blah blah" I later tore him ten new assholes.

Response by Cpl Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 18 at 2014 4:40 PM

Cpl Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 16:40:08 -0400

I was in charge of a radar unit, which had been tasked with setting up a controlled speed zone by an area SgtMjr. This particular area was a 2 lane dead end road about 3 miles long which the personnel would speed on during the commute to work. The SgtMjr did not like that his unit staff were speeding so called us in for traffic control "Speed trap". We setup early and start running our ops, and getting a good haul of speeders, when up comes the SgtMjr speeding faster than anyone else. I pull him over and start to write the ticket has he lambast's me for delaying him from an important meeting, and wasn't he the one that called me in the first place, and did I not see rank on his collar, and here is a lawful order, etc. As I am writing this ticket and getting the biggest faceful and earful of reprimand, I finish can calmly hand the ticket over which he refuses to take. I inform him, that if he has any complaints regarding the manner in which we were conducting our operation he should contact my boss the Base Commanding General. This pretty much ended the tirade, the requests for traffic control, and any other interaction. As a Cpl in charge of a my radar unit, I knew my SOP, hell I memorized it and could recite verbatim. As a Marine, my pucker factor was at level creating diamonds. All I can say is know your SOP and stand by your decisions.

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 18 at 2014 6:11 PM

1SG Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 18:11:12 -0400

I will be reading these all evening! And I do have a few of my own to share!

Shortly after returning from Desert Storm and waiting for our vehicles/equipment to return by ship, the Command Team was sitting in the weekly Bn. Training Meeting going over training schedules. The Bn Cdr asked me (1SG) about two of my platoons who were going out for a day of Paint Ball against each other. After explaining, I informed him and the CSM that they were invited to attend. Both accepted. On the day before the event, I swung thru the Bn HQs with a RED and BLUE sweat shirt. I told them one platoon was wearing Red and the other was wearing Blue and they would be on opposite teams, and the bus would depart from the Bn Hqs parking lot at 0700. At 0655, they walked out of the Bn Hqs to get on the bus. As soon as both stepped in, I said, "Driver, Move out!" Off we went. Then it dawned on the Bn. Cdr, everyone of us was in BDUs and only he and the CSM were in bright colored RED and BLUE Sweatshirts....His words were priceless..." Oh Shit, First Sergeant I will have your ass for this when we get back!" From the back of the bus, someone, shouted, "Sir, you have to make it back first!" Needless to say they got the hell shot out of them that day, even the Cdr's driver (on same team) took pleasure out of shooting him several times when he could. I also took a few in the back, ass and headgear...from my teammates..no doubt! I took pleasure that day in shooting at everyone on both teams, CSM and the Cdr!

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 18 at 2014 6:59 PM

MSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 18:59:07 -0400

While in boot camp at MCRD San Diego we where doing a combat training course. The drill instructor tells me to take point. Everything is going good until all of a sudden a grenade rolls out in front of the squad. I shout grenade right! The squad takes cover to the right. But me oh no I go left, right on the grenade. Lets just say the drill instructor made an example out of this dumb &%^. Oh but he did use very colorful words and expressions.

Response by 1LT Nick Kidwell made Aug 18 at 2014 7:13 PM

1LT Nick Kidwell — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 19:13:01 -0400

Well, there was the time right after BCT graduation.

I was alone in the bay mopping the floor. We had liberty right before, and one of my buddies had exercised his PX privileges to purchase some CDs and a CD player. Before he had left, he told me that I could litsen to some of them if I wanted.

I was rocking out to "Kryptonite" by 3 Doors Down, and was into the second chorus when I looked up and saw Drill Sergeant.

Yeah.

After that, I'd say the first time a rocket flew over my head in Iraq. We were doing a Det Ops mission and I was giving a tour to my PSG inside the TIF. We were caught out in the raceway between the fencelines with no cover, no IBA, no K-pot. It was only a one-shot attack, wham-bam and only a truck blew up, but it was our first time BOG, so we had both sprinted for cover like goofballs.

Response by Sgt Samantha Jee made Aug 18 at 2014 7:29 PM

Sgt Samantha Jee — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 19:29:55 -0400

I was briefing the LtCol on deployment and it was the first time I briefed without notes. I froze for a minute in the middle of the brief and completely forgot what I was talking about. It also happened to be the first brief we did for the British commander that was there with us.

Response by SFC Siva Williams made Aug 18 at 2014 8:58 PM

SFC Siva Williams — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 20:58:15 -0400

August 1990 somewhere around Dhahrhan, Saudi Arabia. I'm in the back of a Deuce and half traveling down the road in a convoy with the 507th Maintenance Company. Every time we make a left turn the truck shudders and you can feel a thumping go thru the vehicle. We eventually stop and try to find out what the deal is. We look at the left front wheel and discover the it is being held on by one lug nut. The others had rattled off and the last was ready to shear off. I was that close to being a casualty during Desert Shield. Probably not the best "oh crap" moment but i figured you guys don't want to hear about the time I was in the 507th's CDR's truck when we wrecked it and totaled it out. The front axle was under my seat when I got out the truck but that's another story and it will cost you a drink.

Response by SCPO Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 19 at 2014 8:05 PM

SCPO Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 19 Aug 2014 20:05:21 -0400

1. Getting off the bus at 0200 on 26 June 1990
2. As an E3 A1C working for the Wing Commander Brigadier General Walker, I came bursting through the door and he was on the other side, I knocked him on his ass, he apologized to me for getting in my way. I did not stop shaking for a week.
3. While on my mob as the Operations LPO (NCOIC for the non Navy Folk) and one of Work Center LPO called and said, "you better get here, CID is here with the PMO". I was with our Company Commander and XO, so that made notifying them easier. Needless to say, had some people do some stupid shit. We were almost done with our tour too!
4. When I saw that I had been selected for Chief Petty Officer.

Response by SPC James Oakes made Aug 20 at 2014 5:20 PM

SPC James Oakes — Wed, 20 Aug 2014 17:20:43 -0400

Surprise barracks walk through by the Battalion CSM (who looked like Uncle Fester and sounded like Ross Perot).

I was 19, my roommate was 20. Fridge FULL of beer we didn't get to over the weekend.

"Private First Class Oakes, how old are you?"

"19 Sergeant Major."

"So if I open this fridge, we won't have any problems, right?"

Opens fridge. Beer rolls out. He pockets the beer.

"Let's try this again...Private First Class Oakes, how old are you?"

"19, Sergeant Major."

Under his breath: "I don't think you're getting this Oakes ..."

"21, Sergeant Major."

"Good man. I hate paperwork." Starts to walk out. Stops. Turns around. Comes back to fridge. Opens it up, beer rolls out. Pockets beer. Walks out and says under his breath "It's like a god damn slot machine!"

Response by PO1 Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 20 at 2014 6:12 PM

PO1 Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 20 Aug 2014 18:12:51 -0400

I was LPO / acting Division officer for A-gang on a destroyer underweigh during wartime. The command decided to have an awards ceremony to which I had put in every one of my troops for (and they received). However, we had an evaporator down (1 of 2) and it had to get back on line. As the LPO I knew how to fix it and thus I sent everyone else to the awards - after all they had AWARDS to receive!

I'm down in the bilges, wet, hot, sweaty, twisted up and stuck like a MF trying to get this pump out so I can replace a strainer assembly on the evaporator...I hear a voice somewhere but I can't make it out...so I figure it's someone on watch trying to take a reading on a downed piece of gear. I yell up: "it's broke you F&*(ing moron come back in 6 hours!" Again, I hear a voice - but can't make it out. I yell: "listen, unless you're pants are on fire or you have a serious need for a beat-down foxtrot oscar!"...or words to that effect.

Again, I hear a voice and yet again I can't make out what they're saying - but it's obvious that they are trying to get my attention. So, I crawl out, bitching to myself about how it took me 20 minutes to get into that location and into that convoluted, twisted postion and how I was gonna reposition someone's physical attributes..... So, I popped up, pushing up the access panel only to be met by the Carrier's Admiral, his entire staff, My Commanding Officer, XO, Cheng and my entire Division - all proudly wearing the awards I had so painstakingly written up, justified, argued and debated about and smoozed to the top in order to ensure they got them. However, I was never informed I was also getting an award - something I abhor! (Frankly, I'd rather get every tooth in my head removed, without pain killer, than attend an award ceremony or any type of formation.) They had decided that if PO1 wouldn't come to the awards ceremony, the awards ceremony would come to PO1.

OH CRAP.

Response by CMDCM Gene Treants made Aug 20 at 2014 6:20 PM

CMDCM Gene Treants — Wed, 20 Aug 2014 18:20:58 -0400

While I was station on Guam at the Naval Transmitter Site, Barriguada we had around 225 High Frequency Transmitters that were supporting communications to Vietnam and back to the rest of the world. Most of our Transmitters were 10,000 Watts AN/FRT-39, but we also had a few AN/FRT-40 that Transmitted at 40,000 watts and even a couple of AN/FRT-62 Transmitters that put out 200,000 Watts.

As long as we had 220 Transmitters up and working we were in good shape, but once we dropped below that level, we were in trouble and needed to get our equipment back on line ASAP. Design flaws in the 40s were basically in the high power sections of the transmitters and sometimes required some disassembly and rebuilding at a rapid pace. Whenever a 40 went down, it was a major exercise in sweat and immediately got attention from the higher ups. It was not unusual for a chief or even our OIC to come out and see what progress was being made.

One day I was working on a 40 that had been down for about an hour. I was a Third Class Petty Officer (E-4) and was running the section because I was the best tech and leader, inspite of having a E-5 working for me. I was deep inside of the transmitter and both the Chief and OIC had already come out to check on me and I had given them an update. I was almost finished, but still buried in the innards of the beast - putting it back together when another pair of brown shoes and khaki pants showed up and asked how it was going. Without looking it said, " Chief, I already told you I would get this damn thing working, Leave me the F*** alone." And he went away with out saying another word. About 10 min later I finished putting it back together and took another 10 min to check it out and make sure it was working. Cleaning the area took a few min and then I walked into the Maintenance Office and told the Chief his Damn Transmitter was back up and he could stop bugging me. About that time the Commanding Officer of the Base apologized for bothering me and said he was very happy to know I had fixed the F***ing Transmitter. He then took me to the club and got me a beer.

Response by SGT Craig Northacker made Aug 20 at 2014 6:35 PM

SGT Craig Northacker — Wed, 20 Aug 2014 18:35:56 -0400

I was in AIT at Fort Polk, where we were in the old splinter city barracks. There were several commodes next to each other with no walls in between, and there were no real tp holders-so we always had a roll of tp available that we would pass back and forth as needed. I learned quickly to be one of the first ones on the pot, because I had the tp roll first. You knew they were out when some hapless soldier would ask for the roll, only to find out the previous soldier just finished the last of the roll. Oh, crap indeed!

Response by SGT Craig Northacker made Aug 20 at 2014 6:38 PM

SGT Craig Northacker — Wed, 20 Aug 2014 18:38:59 -0400

I was in NYC in 1968 getting ready to go to a boarding school, and realized at the last moment I did not have a US plug for my tape recorder. I ran out of the hotel and down the steps two at a time, barreling through a group of men who were very surprised and not very happy. I turned around to yell a quick sorry, and saw that I had just blown through Presidential Candidate Nixon and a host of his posse.

Response by SFC Siva Williams made Aug 20 at 2014 8:45 PM

SFC Siva Williams — Wed, 20 Aug 2014 20:45:44 -0400

Not so much an "oh crap" moment but it was funny under the circumstances. My years as an SGL teaching BNCOC (ALC) gave me a huge network of 68W NCOs. I was in Mosul on a MITT when 3d ACR rotated in. The PSG for the 3/3 ACR's BAS was a former student and he told me he had some good guys but they were young. A day or so later my team, the IA, and Thunder 6 + PSD are rolling outside the wire touring the battle space when the gun truck in front of me is hit by an IED. I get out and start triaging, removing, and treating casualties from the wreckage. This PFC runs up to me with an aid bag and proceeds to tell me how to treat the IA patient I was working on. I told him "I got this, take the other patient." He paused then stared at my chest (noticed the rank), then looked at my aid bag, then stared at my rank again before scurrying off to the other patient. I talked to his PSG later that day and he told me that the kid was so nervous that he threw up before roll out. Turns our the young man was a recent graduate of AIT and this was his first mission. He said he was scared when he knew he had to use his skills but then he saw a SFC and he felt much better at that point. I should have told the kid that the anxiousness never really goes away. It was funny as hell watching the realization that a E-7 medic was outside the wire putting in work. They tell the AIT kids at Sam that they will be all alone out there and that there won't be any NCOs to help them.

Response by MAJ Jim Woods made Aug 20 at 2014 9:03 PM

MAJ Jim Woods — Wed, 20 Aug 2014 21:03:41 -0400

Sittin' on a latrine/wooden ammo box at a fire/patrol base in the Centeral Highland of VN (1969 2nd tour and a Captain at the time). We started taking mortar/RPG/small arms fire....... somewhere there is a picture of a Captain running across the Fire Base with his pants at half mast. We had all been commando since 67'. I hope Charlie laughed as much as we did. After the "crap" was over of course.

Response by PO1 Rick Serviss made Aug 21 at 2014 3:55 AM

PO1 Rick Serviss — Thu, 21 Aug 2014 03:55:12 -0400

I was painting the Admiral's cabin on the ship, getting ready for him to embark the next day. After I pealed off some masking tape I wadded it up and put it on the newspaper I laid down to protect the carpet. I saw that I missed a spot and got on my knees to do a fast touch up. When I was getting back up, I flipped over the can and got paint all over his carpet.

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 21 at 2014 5:06 PM

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 21 Aug 2014 17:06:25 -0400

CPT Private RallyPoint Member A Colonel called and wanted information (weather) about a Met Watch Warning for high winds. He was watching the anemometer and according to him there wasn't a wind higher than 20Kts. Oh and I wasn't being flexible. I told him, "forecasting is all about potentiality and I had justification for the forecast".

He coerced the forecaster on the midshift and then disaster struck. Two C-141 Starlifters were damaged when winds reached 88 Kts. My warning was for up to 49kts. Never-the-less, my not being "flexible' saved lives. The one dreaded fear of a forecast is a plane crashing and people being killed

Then SSgt Halbiesin told to NEVER take risks. I am glad I heeded that advice. Our commander said he was proud of me and would I do a review pertaining to the event scenario? The Wing Commander was happy with me as well.

Doing the right and best thing can collide with 'THE MISSION'. 1LT Sandy Annala MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca Maj Private RallyPoint Member

Response by CDR Thomas Gatliffe made Aug 22 at 2014 12:17 PM

CDR Thomas Gatliffe — Fri, 22 Aug 2014 12:17:30 -0400

Seated to the left of a submariner O-6 in the US-3A transiting up to Northern Arabian Sea from Diego Garcia, watching as the tail skeg of the KA-6 tanker ripped the nose off our aircraft when our pilot lost it while hooking up to refuel at 30,000 ft. We immediately went into a negative-G pull-over in order to reduce the likelihood of an explosive decompression since the pilot's wind screen was totally glazed and the only thing holding it together was the inner laminate layer. I reached up into the overhead and retrieved the O-6's camera that he had been using to take pictures looking out between the pilot and co-pilot during the evolution. I handed it to the nearly catatonic Captain with the comment "You might want to keep the strap around your neck, sir." It was only after we recovered on RANGER and I got out and saw everything forward of the cockpit was GONE (!!) that I said "OH, SXXt!" and then went below to start writing the repair orders. (The O-6 submariner vowed that the next time he came to the IO, it would be a few hundred feet below the water's surface, not 30K feet above it.)

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 24 at 2014 8:15 PM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Sun, 24 Aug 2014 20:15:28 -0400

When I came back from Ranger School and found out that my "Saluting LTs Question" became an war waged among the members of RP.

Response by SSgt Harvey Hawkins made Sep 23 at 2014 7:39 PM

SSgt Harvey Hawkins — Tue, 23 Sep 2014 19:39:34 -0400

WAAAAY back in 1980, I was on the graveyard shift on the flight line at Shaw AFB. I was getting ready to start my pre-flight for the day lighters to have a flight ready at 0800 so it was just before 0400 when I started. After I got finished with the cockpit I was getting ready to crawl the intake to check the engines When I took the cover off the #1 (left engine of my Phantom, I saw the arms of 2 flight suits. I figured no big deal, fighter pilots like to be a little kinky sometimes. Then I got a good look at the bare feet and then it hit me. We didn't have any female pilots at Shaw.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 4 at 2014 11:16 PM

MAJ Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 04 Oct 2014 23:16:23 -0400

Can't believe I'm going to say this but here goes...I'm a young SSG at Ft Riley, KS and we are doing a field exercise and well things got a little hot. I'm using an arty simulator in high grass that is extremely dry and well the results were explosive. Before I knew it the grass around me, my Kevlar helmet and my MBITR were all on fire. Thankfully my LT looked down saw this and several Soldiers came to my rescue. Before we knew it half the darn training area was on fire and well I was missing my eyebrows..a fact 1SG Jason Fitzpatrick will never let me live down. Thankfully the only injury was my pride and eyebrows of course but at least I didn't owe money!

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 5 at 2014 3:12 AM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Sun, 05 Oct 2014 03:12:09 -0400

During WLC when we were doing battle drills, the SGL's would throw smoke. It just so happened that one of the smoke grenades that was thrown caught some of the grass/leaves on fire. Everyone had to stop what they were doing and we were trying to put out this fire by stomping the ground and throwing what ever water we had on it. Other classes saw the fire and got involved and they started throwing their water on this fire. It didn't seem like the fire was that big, maybe 10 feet in diameter, but I remember the heat being very intense. I've never been that close to a brush fire before. Thankfully, we were able to kill the fire. We got very lucky that day.

Response by PFC Zanie Young made Nov 4 at 2014 8:56 AM

PFC Zanie Young — Tue, 04 Nov 2014 08:56:34 -0500

Doing dumb Private things like saluting privates or leaning forward when I should be doing pushups... or having your thumb caught while rappelling down the wall in Basic... or even falling into the net repeatedly on that single rope bridge and laughing about it...

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 17 at 2015 3:49 PM

1SG Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 17 Apr 2015 15:49:35 -0400

Fortunately, this is something I witnessed.

On a Sunday afternoon during basic training, we had just arrived from morning service. Sundays were always area beautification day and we were just getting ready to join the rest of our cohorts when the Senior Drill Sergeant walks in. Wr look around and realized that everything was squared but we missed something as Privates often do.

Somehow we didn't see the private asleep in his bed at 1:00 pm in the afternoon. Well, the DS took a B-line right to his bunk and did the unexpected... He "tossed it". I mean with force!

Oh Crap!!!

The private jumps off the floor and proceeds to curse the living day lights out of the Senior Drill Sergeant. (I can't even type the things this kid said while he was half-sleep).

Oh Snap!

Needless to say, the poor kid got chewed, smoked, and dehydrated! He had to carry at least 20 sandbags about half a mile in the woods to fox hole one at a time, then go back into the foxhole and return them in the same method before dinner chow. I felt bad for the Soldier!

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 17 at 2015 6:16 PM

SPC Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 17 Apr 2015 18:16:39 -0400

Friday and last day of a 4 week field exercise.

On post getting a safety briefing from EVERYONE in my chain of command (to include our full-bird)

Brand spanking new PFC medic, 18yo, straight out of AIT attends all these briefings.

After formation, head back to the aid station. CPL Kinas orders/BEGS her to just stay on post one weekend, and no alcohol at all this weekend (illegal for her freakin' age anyway).

I get a call at 0100 the next morning from her freaking roommate that she was picked up at the freakin front gate for failing a breathalizer and the MPs have her.

My "oh-shit" moment was when i realized I have to meet with her and 1SG Grumpy (not real name) and the MP station.

My ENTIRE weekend was spent at the motor pool watching her sweep the pavement with a push broom. sun-up to sundown one my first days off for a freakin' month. She got better, but I was pissed for a looooooong time.

Response by SFC Douglas Davis made Apr 17 at 2015 6:18 PM

SFC Douglas Davis — Fri, 17 Apr 2015 18:18:57 -0400

I had been out all night at Graf moving from range to range that we had scheduled to occupy them, as we were not going to need them. We got beck into the barracks area about 1100. I had been out for 36 hours. The Company Commander told me that I need to go to the Battalion HQ and report to the BN Commander.
I went over saw the CSM he walked me to the Commanders office. I reported to the Commander and apologized for my appearance he laughed at me and told me that my sequence number was 0013. Shook my hand and told me to get cleaned up and some rest.

I called my wife told her that I was dirty, tired, hungry, horny and promotable. She asked me to repeat that and I started in again when she stopped me and said no the last one. That was how I found out that I was being promoted to SFC and how I told my wife.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Apr 17 at 2015 7:31 PM

MAJ Ken Landgren — Fri, 17 Apr 2015 19:31:32 -0400

My first field problem as an Armor PL at Ft Hood, TX. We conducted night maneuvers with zero illumination. The platoon played a trick on me, they took out the batteries of the NVG and I could only see black. The Tank Commanders were say LT go here go there and I just could not do anything. It took me 5 minutes to figure out those effers were in their tanks laughing.

Response by SFC Walter Mack made Apr 17 at 2015 9:11 PM

SFC Walter Mack — Fri, 17 Apr 2015 21:11:31 -0400

As a recruiter, I was driving in the old G-Jet, and got a call from my BN CDR personally.

"I need you to come to my office right now. Stop whatever you're doing and get up here."

All I thought was damnit. There's enough things a recruiter can get in trouble for, but to step in so deep that the CO wants to address you personally is bad.

I get there, and he says, "We have to call this special agent from the FBI. One of your future Soldiers has a problem."

Oh hell..., so..., we get the guy on the horn, and apparently, my Soldier's wife, who was fully aware that he would leave her when he got his citizenship (he was from Ghana), decided to make some phone calls. She told the FBI that he was an African muslim terrorist that was making threats against the U.S. Once I explained the situation, all was well, and he never committed any acts of terrorism. I kept the poop stained drawers as a souvenir.

I don't know that it's my biggest oh crap moment, but it comes to mind.

Response by MSG David Chappell made Apr 17 at 2015 9:19 PM

MSG David Chappell — Fri, 17 Apr 2015 21:19:15 -0400

Let me start by saying I have so many of these each funnier than the last. I will start with this one and if you want more ask and I will post more along this same topic. I promise not to disappoint. First if you have ever been to Battle Staff you know this school is mentally challenging the school fails 50% of the students on the first test of the second day. It was the last day and we had to put together a full combat operations plan with all graphics and overlays and I was the battle captain and was to brief. what I did not know was the commandant of the NCO Academy was going to be present that day when I decided to wear the official outfit if you'll notice in the picture I am wearing my talk badge. The briefing is a completely other story and was definitely an oh crap moment when I turned and there was the commandant of the school. The picture explains much

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 17 at 2015 9:59 PM

SPC Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 17 Apr 2015 21:59:07 -0400

September 11, 2001.

I was attached to the local 902nd field office from the 513th. It was a nice way for CI agents to get some actual experience while CONUS. I'd been there about three weeks when September 11 happened. Oh crap moment one. Since the universe hates me, the NCOIC was out on medical leave, the specialist actually assigned to the office was in Korea getting married, and the OIC was TDY. Two specialists from the 513th had come over with me, but they had recently graduated from AIT, while I had been out and about for a year, so the chief said I was in charge while he was gone. Suffice it to say I was out of my league. The next 48 were hell.
I guess someone in the 902nd realized that they had no-one in the office but some loaners from another unit that might be called back at anytime so they sent a civilian. More importantly they didn't give him any instructions on what to do. He showed up, ensconced himself in the chief's office and once a day asked for status report on our activities. On the fifteenth, the deputy commanding General for fort Gordon (not an actual General I learned, but still a colonel) came by our office and chewed me out for not attending and contributing to the base force protection cell meetings and briefings in accordance with some SOP that I didn't know about, much less read. Oh Crap moment 2. The only colonel I'd ever talked to up to that point was my father's brigade commander when I was 17 at his retirement ceremony.
Then he told me he wanted to look at our case files and message traffic for the last three days. I told him no. Oh Crap moment 3. I don't think he heard that often. He walked out of the office confused. I was dying inside, I was sure I had just killed my short career. More importantly, that civilian never even opened the door. So the next day I sent a representative to the force protection briefing. I knew the colonel was going to be there, I have to admit I punked out, my smoking habit was up to three packs a day, I was running on cat naps, caffeine, and nicotine.
The soldier I sent came back with a copy of the slides from the briefing. I never looked at them. I was overwhelmed by the walk-ins and calls we were getting. (The Gordon office also covered forts Jackson and Stewart, Hunter AAF, and provided initial reporting for Charleston and kingsbay naval bases. not counting all the reserve and national guard facilities).
The 17th, the chief calls. He hadn't called up until this point. I'm not sure if his TDY was just that important or he thought someone from his unit would have covered it, I can't imagine he thought a PFC and two shake and bake Specialists were swinging this alone. The civilian comes to get me and closes the office door as I walk in. The chief on speaker phone says,"I don't know what's happening, but in five minutes you are getting called by FBI in Atlanta. Give them what they want."
Oh Crap. (I've lost track)
Want to know how out of my pay grade I was? The secretary called me. "Stand by for supervisory special agent Spry." He proceeded to chew me out for thirty minutes over a threat assessment that originated in my office. I couldn't get a word in. He hung up. At that point in my career I'd never heard of a threat assessment, much less done one. Civilian looked at me and shrugged. I asked the two specialists if they had sent any emails or faxes, they said no. I looked this Fbi guy up Dell Spry. head FBI agent for south east region. Also the guy who arrested Aldrich Ames. Much later, after he was gone, I found out the civilian had faxed the slides from that briefing to higher headquarters, and they faxed it on and on and on.
Good times.....

Response by SrA Matthew Knight made Apr 17 at 2015 10:29 PM

SrA Matthew Knight — Fri, 17 Apr 2015 22:29:14 -0400

*Two hours into sleep.*
BANG BANG BANG "FIRST SERGEANT!!!!"
*Oh great**Open Door*
"Grab your keys, put your shoes on and go down stairs to the dayroom now, don't bring anything else."
OSI with the assistance of the First Sergeants decided to do a dorm raid. The bang on the door and yelling of the unfamiliar first shirt was the "oh crap". Never did get back to sleep after all was said and done and I had to work that day.

Another one would be sitting in my room playing XBox and I start hearing radio chatter outside.
*Knock knock* *Open door to two guys in HAZMAT suits*
"Have you noticed any weird smells or anything that has caused your eyes to burn the past few days, mainly in the bathroom area?"
"Yea, an odd smell but nothing burning my eyes."
"May I come in and take a look?"
"Sure." (Why would I say no to the Fire Department)
*Fire Fighter in the bathroom*"We have a hit, .02"
*Fire Fighter still at the door* ".02, alright, we are going to need you to shut everything off and go down stairs. Talk to the gentleman in the ambulance."
Turns out, someone had been painting or something in their room and had left the freshly painted item near their heater to dry in a closed room (this was mid-winter). The fumes had spread throughout our section in the dorms via an access panel connected to all of our section in the bathrooms. Someone on the opposite side(our bathrooms share a common back wall) had the smell so bad it was burning her eyes. I had noticed it but took it as another usual bad smell in the old building, threw an air freshener in the bathroom and called it good. Guess it wasn't very healthy.

Those are the two that got my heart pounding. Had plenty of other little things but those were the most memorable.

Response by SSG (ret) William Martin made Apr 18 at 2015 7:54 PM

SSG (ret) William Martin — Sat, 18 Apr 2015 19:54:54 -0400

Insteading having my own "Oh crap" moments, I like to help others get into their own "oh crap" moments in the performance of my duties as Military Police officer. :)

Response by SPC Angel Guma made Apr 18 at 2015 8:21 PM

SPC Angel Guma — Sat, 18 Apr 2015 20:21:29 -0400

My deployment orders.

But it was a different sort of 'oh crap', because I felt I was earning the right to be a soldier more than just going through the motions and not feeling like I was living up to the part.

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 18 at 2015 9:00 PM

1SG Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 18 Apr 2015 21:00:47 -0400

Thought I would share another one: Happened with the same Bn Cdr/CSM whom I mentioned in my earlier post...and an early morning discussion I had with ...whome else...the XVIII Abn Corps IG office.

IG: 1SG I understand you have a remedial PT Program that you're calling PMS PT?"
1SG: Yes Sir, I sure do!"
IG: Well, 1SG, we've had a few complaints from some soldiers in your unit!"
1SG: I’m sure you’re going to share them with me, right Colonel?"
IG: Well, I would just ask you to take a minute and re-look it, you know what I mean....what you're calling it may be offensive some of your soldiers."
1SG: Sir, obviously the complaint is coming from one or two of those Fat ASS, PT Test failing, profile riding SOBs in the program.....That's why it's called "Poor Motivational Syndrone" PT, get it "PMS". Now unless you have something else to talk about...I need to get outside so I can motivate their PMS whining asses.
IG: Ahhh...1SG...
ISG: "Thanks for the call Sir, I will relay your concerns for their wellbeing this morning and then see if they will want to call you again. I have something special now planned for them. Shouldn't you be at PT this morning Sir....Come on down Sir, promise you a damn motivating PT session. Have a nice day Sir!”
The “Oh Crap” moment (which I knew was coming) came about 2 minutes later when the phone rang, it was the Bn. CSM calling, (trying to hide laughter) he says, “1SG, get your GD ass up here now, the Bn Cdr wishes to have a word with you concerning your conversation with the IG a few minutes ago!” Always poking the bear, I said, “Damn Sergeant Major, can’t the Colonel wait until I get over my PMS this morning!” The Bn Cdr, who was listening to the call(on speaker) said, “ Now 1SG, before I have to deal with the Bde Cdr, whom the IG has just threatened to call!” Oh Crap….”On the way Sir!”

The Bn Cdr's concern was that he personally approved the name of the remedial program when I started it and wrote the SOP. He thought it humorous.....until the IG and the possibility of the Bde Cdr getting a call. I never told the Bn Cdr that the Bde Cdr was already aware of it. He and I were frequent opponents on the racquetball court and had said, "don't be surprised if you hear from the IG."

Those were some super leaders back then! But I think with the changes that have taken place since then, something like this could lead to big problems up and down the chain of command...Maybe not though! I'm just saying!

Response by SP5 Michael Rathbun made Apr 18 at 2015 9:02 PM

SP5 Michael Rathbun — Sat, 18 Apr 2015 21:02:19 -0400

Of a different sort:

The New Barracks for BCT at Ft Wood in 1968 had the Orderly Room located in a different building from the rest of the Company. So the CQ runner (such as my PV1 self at this moment) would hang out in the actual orderly room in case the phone rang (forwarding? not likely) while the CQ was in the operations room in the barracks where he could .. uh .. take charge of the quarters.

I step out into a fine night for a smoke. Behind me, I hear "Click". Yes friends, having left the huge "KEY TO ORDERLY ROOM" paddle behind, I have just locked myself out of the Orderly Room. This is doubleplus ungood.

I remember that I have a basic lock pick kit in my wallet. I speculate that, surely, the door locks on a US Military Installation would not succumb to a 20-year-old PV1 with a narrow piece of formed spring steel and a nicely shaped length of piano wire.

Then again, what's to lose? To my relief and distress, it took almost 30 seconds of work to let myself back into the Orderly Room.

Todo solucionado. Was more careful about what I did with enormous key paddles when vacating for a smoke in future.

Eventually it dawned on me that I could make cigarette money letting guys back into their wall lockers after they threw their fatigues in (with keys still in pocket, natch), slammed the door and headed out for the shower.

Pay me, or go downstairs (wrapped in a towel) and ask for the 1SG's bolt cutters. I'm cheaper than a new lock in the PX, by the way, and the 1SG doesn't have to know about this incident.

"Wow, man, don't they come and hassle you every time somebody reports a stolen item?"

"Think about it: everybody in the company knows that I can open any wall locker or foot locker in under 20 seconds. I'm gonna steal something? Much better deal helping my friends out when they have a momentary loss of grip. The money averages out better."

Response by Sgt Branden W. made Apr 18 at 2015 9:19 PM

Sgt Branden W. — Sat, 18 Apr 2015 21:19:02 -0400

Mortar live fire. 29 Palms California. I was the 81mm mortar FO. Then I heard our Arty guys fire for effect on the mortar pos, thinking it was a target location. Could have gotten really bad, really quickly. Time of flight for an arty round was about 30 seconds and you should have seen those Marines move. Someone got their ass chewed, never found out who f-Ed up the target location. Got tense that's for sure.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 18 at 2015 9:58 PM

MAJ Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 18 Apr 2015 21:58:23 -0400

While at Basic Training I told my then girlfriend (now ex) that I could not come home for the birth of our child. It was during critical training and I wasn't even going to ask for numerous reasons. I was there for Infantry OSUT.

She wrote an email to the Commander.

When my DS screamed for me to come to the office he asked "Why the f*ck does the 1SG want to see you?"
"I...I Have no idea Drill Sergeant"
"Get down there now"

I go and see him...
1SG: "Why is your fiancee writing to the Commander?!" (going through my head...uh I Have no fiancee...)
Me: "No clue 1SG" and immediately started pushing without being told
1SG: "Get up. She wants you to come home for your child's birth. You're going home on your own dime during the Family Day pass. Get out of here and go see your Drill Sergeant to schedule and pay for your flight"
Me: "Roger First Sergeant!"

I left scared but thankful. I Had a conversation with her about never doing that ever again.

Response by SGT John Wesley made Apr 19 at 2015 3:05 AM

SGT John Wesley — Sun, 19 Apr 2015 03:05:07 -0400

Basic Training, while cleaning our weapons under a shade tree, I took it upon myself to do my impersonation of my Drill Sergeant who had a terrible lisp and spit on most of us a time or ten.

Anyways, I'm killing it! The guys are laughing and I go into this long lisp filled rant and realize that no one is laughing.

I felt a chill go thru me as I hear Drill Sgt David clear his throat....

Needless to say, I was on his list for the duration. Lots of push ups and "Area Beautification ".

As I was getting ready to leave for Redstone after graduation, he pulled me aside and told me that mine was the best impression he'd heard so far!

Response by PO1 John Miller made Apr 19 at 2015 8:49 PM

PO1 John Miller — Sun, 19 Apr 2015 20:49:28 -0400

I was doing a routine engine check on my assigned pusher boat (pretty much a Boston Whaler boat) when I was assigned to Port Services division at Naval Submarine Base Point Loma. I was in the engine compartment checking something on the starboard engine, so my back was to the port engine. These engine compartments were pretty small, so if you moved your arms back at all you could easily brush against the opposite engine. I did just that and felt my left elbow brush against something plastic and move it. I immediately knew what it was, the plastic safety covering for the emergency Halon activation button.

I audibly gasped (too nervous to even say "oh shit") and turned around for a better look. Luckily I had just lifted up the cover and not pushed the activation button. So I closed the cover and completed my engine checks.

When I finished I reported back to my boat captain (an E-5/PO2) and he asked his normal question "Any issues?" I said no but I told him about the little incident. He got a good laugh about it and said he would probably have gotten a bit nervous too, but probably wouldn't have freaked out as much as I did, because I was more experienced than me (I was an E-2/Seaman Apprentice at the time).

Response by PO1 John Miller made Apr 19 at 2015 8:54 PM

PO1 John Miller — Sun, 19 Apr 2015 20:54:55 -0400

Not really an "oh crap" moment, but as I got older my white blonde facial hair got a lot darker. So dark to the point where I had (still have but my post-retirement beard covers them up) dark hair follicles on my face.

I was constantly being harassed about not shaving and accused of lying about having dark follicles. It got to the point where I would often have to ask my superiors if they wanted to rub their hand on my face to see if I was lying. A few actually took me up on it and finally believed me, and a few wanted me to "go shave again."

By the time I had about 15 years in the Navy I was one of those guys who had to shave twice a day. If I didn't, I'd have 5 o'clock shadow by the end of the work day.

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 19 at 2015 9:08 PM

MSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Sun, 19 Apr 2015 21:08:12 -0400

Mine has to be when I had just got home from shift and my LT called me back in. The jet I had worked on all day crashed on the runway. I was terrified.

Response by Col Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 19 at 2015 9:17 PM

Col Private RallyPoint Member — Sun, 19 Apr 2015 21:17:15 -0400

We were in Gagetown CFB, New Brunswick doing demolition training. There was an assortment of items left for disposal - it was in the late 1980's the wild west compared to today - and it needed to vanish so we could pack up and convoy home. In the combat engineer world, P stands for equivalent Pounds of TNT - it also means "plenty". We had plenty.

We calculated we needed to be back at least 1500 feet...perhaps more would have been better. There was a small command detonation bunker with 20 earth walls near the demo point. Two personnel were safely in the bunker. The rest of us went to the "safe point" at the calculated distance. Command detonation occurred: the earth went up taking the shape of a tactical nuclear device - debris went higher than we ever could have imagined....it was coming down in a trajectory towards us...yes, we dove under our 5 T dump trucks and some large hunks of earth fell on our vector about 50 feet beyond the truck. "Oh crap" hardly covered that moment.

There are several other similar stories working with those nearing retirement Vietnam Vets as a young officer...

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 20 at 2015 12:08 AM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 20 Apr 2015 00:08:50 -0400

When I was in Ft Lee we had room inspections from the 1LT (XO) and the other PLT SGTs and instructors, they we're checking a ceilings for contraband , The XO push the ceilings up in the Latrobe and a pair of underwear fell out with stains , the other soilders I shared a room with satired and AW as the XO pulled the underwear off his face, we had no idea how they got there I thought he was going to mess are worlds up thinking we did it, he was cool about it gave us a blank stair and said "this doesn't leave the Barracks".Told us carry on and proceeded to the next room.

Response by CAPT Kevin B. made Apr 20 at 2015 1:01 PM

CAPT Kevin B. — Mon, 20 Apr 2015 13:01:00 -0400

I went from PO-3rd to O-1 which meant I was an Ensign. And by definition, Ensigns screw up. I was in front of my division on the grinder at Port Hueneme for a change of command. When the order of "officers draw swords" came, I crisply pulled my sword out and swung it in the air. So far perfect with the exception of the blade coming out of the handle and whipping through the air only to impale itself into the podium. Everyone looked at me to see the butt knob fall off the grip and roll around longer than physics allows.

After the gasp, silence, and then complete melt down laughter, the Command Master Chief picked everything up and told me everything would be alright. I received the sword back at a special ceremony later. The Seabees welded everything back together to ensure no recurrence of that malfunction. To this day, feeling the slightly heavier than normal helft of the sword brings back many memories.

The "legend" continued when I deployed next. I was eating my meal in the galley which used the metal trays. My fork was hanging over the edge of the tray when I accidentally slapped it and it flew somewhere behind me. I turned around to see the Skipper holding it impaled in his desert cake saying "Kev, this really has to stop". The CMC just said he couldn't help me on this one.

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 20 at 2015 5:44 PM

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 20 Apr 2015 17:44:59 -0400

I would have to say that it was the time that I was on an alarm call to one of our ICBM sites during a severe thunderstorm warning. We get to the site & start doing our site inspection when I hear the ominous "train rumble". I look back & notice this long, thin tail come down from a cloud & touch down. Its direction of travel? Straight towards our sight.

"Command post, we have a situation."
"What is it, airman?"
"Sir, we have a tornado bearing down on us. Advise on actions." (we were in the middle of nowhere w/ no cover other than the silo).
-silence-
"Command post, come back. Time is limited."
"Airman, command suggests shelter in silo."
"Come again?"

We had to open up the access port & climb down. Fortunately the tornado missed the sight. But I'm pretty sure I needed new undies after that one.

Response by SFC Steven Borders made Apr 21 at 2015 6:04 PM

SFC Steven Borders — Tue, 21 Apr 2015 18:04:31 -0400

CPT Private RallyPoint Member I got a big one. I was a brand new PV2 to Fort Stewart. Straight out of Basic so I am really new to everything. I get BN staff duty. And it just happens that we are under 100% ID checks everywhere. Even in the BN and well I was doing as instructed checking everyones ID's and not letting SM's in that don't have it.

Well one of those SM's happen to be the BN Commander. I politely ask him for his ID not realizing who he was. He was in PT's no less. He looks at me and says look up their on the wall theirs my ID.

I was so flabbergasted that I didn't call the BN to attention and he storms off. Well needless to say as the CSM came down to chew us out. I never did BN staff duty ever again. LOL

Response by SFC Mark Merino made Apr 22 at 2015 12:31 AM

SFC Mark Merino — Wed, 22 Apr 2015 00:31:57 -0400

We had a 2.75 rocket punched off into the dirt berm RIGHT in front of the helicopter that was doing armt checks while still on the pad. I waved off the helicopter hoping I didn't get blown onto the main rotor blades from detonation. I maintained complete control of my sphincter......that time.

Response by SSG Trevor S. made Apr 22 at 2015 12:55 AM

SSG Trevor S. — Wed, 22 Apr 2015 00:55:27 -0400

Some of the guys with O.A.F. beards and cool dune buggies popped off a MK-19 round through the windshield of a fuel tanker that supplied a FARP I was near at the time. With everyone on their bellies looking for the source of contact the bearded ones rolled past in their dune buggy while one shouted "My Bad". The only injuries were to the fuel truck cab and air filter.

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 22 at 2015 1:26 AM

MSG Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 22 Apr 2015 01:26:42 -0400

No shit. There I was...

I had just opened the shed that contained the microwave modem for the Afghan Wireless shot that connected my COP to the rest of the world so a contractor could see what our infrastructure looked like. Then the first explosion happened.

Me: "We are under attack. You need to find your way back to the TOC. SGT C____ will show you where to take shelter.
Him: You aren't coming?
Me: No. There's an alarm going off here and I need to check it out first.

Unknown to me, the shelter that contained our wireless shot had been with out power for two days. (We changed SOP shortly after this.)

So I had opened the door and found the alarm going off at about the same time as the first rocket explosion. Had my conversation with the contractor and once he was on his way back to the TOC determined that the alarm was because of a no power situation.

So, WTF? Why no power? My major thought--we are under attack and our primary connection to the outside world could stop working at any time. (There was a battery backup but of an unknown life.

I start tracing lines for as far as I know--about 12".

Adjacent buildings have breakers--let's check those.

I find only a bag of tortilla chips (I've missed supper and the servers are all in the shelters). So I'm checking breakers and eating chips when I find a panel at our gym that should be supplying us but is not.

A feed line from the generator for 220 power had gone bad. But I didn't know about it, and the breaker for my shelter wasn't marked....

The maintenance chief was my next stop--we determined that we had power for an indefinite period (the backup,and that a temp line could be put in until the permanent fix could be contracted.

The Afghan Wireless people are the real heroes. They engineered a backup that would last a month or longer. All I accomplished, by round about method, was to determine that we would be okay for a while.

We restored full power the next week.

I start looking at all the adjacent structures to see if there aee tripped

Response by CMSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 22 at 2015 12:52 PM

CMSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 22 Apr 2015 12:52:53 -0400

I just returned from Korea circa 1994 and I had my physical along with the AIDS test done. I was told they would only call me if it was positive. I wasn't too worried but at 21 it was a scary concept. Anyhow, fast forward 2 weeks and I'm sitting in my shop and the phone rings, another airmen answers and says it's for me. As I'm walking across the shop he says it's "the clinic" at that moment I became paralyzed with fear and that walk suddenly seemed like a mile, it was like the movies when someone running down the hallway and the hallway zooms out and is really long. So I finally get to the phone and all I hear is "Hello Airmen Corcoran this is the clinic", my heart drops, "just wanted to let you know your hearing protection is ready." Needless to say I almost collapsed and here 21 years later I remember like it was yesterday.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Apr 22 at 2015 2:06 PM

MAJ Ken Landgren — Wed, 22 Apr 2015 14:06:33 -0400

I went to an Armor Battalion meeting as a 2LT. At the conclusion of the meeting I was poking fun at the Battalion Commander, not knowing he was right behind me. I was stoopid lol

Response by SSG Paul Forel made May 6 at 2015 11:55 AM

SSG Paul Forel — Wed, 06 May 2015 11:55:38 -0400

Getting caught working a candy bar machine while in BCT.

Fortunately, quick thinking and some creative conversation saved me.

I still think I should have gotten a ribbon for tricking that Drill Sergeant.

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 26 at 2016 11:51 AM

LTC Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 26 Feb 2016 11:51:32 -0500

Yellowknife Canada, 1986. we were TDY supporting an F-16 squadron doing a training exercise. One night we go to this place called "the float base". It is tequila night and shots are a dollar. the kicker is you have to drink 12 to get the discount. Young SGT Burch can't resist. About an hour later a drunken Canadian is talking trash about americans and young patriotic SGT Burch takes offense and headbutts him. As I am standing over him about to start punching him in the face, his buddy breaks a bar stool across my back. this starts a full on, old school bar brawl. I dive over the bar and crawl out the back door and back to the hotel. The Mounties show up and arrest everyone. they call our LT to go get everyone out of jail and they start blue falconing me. "SGT Burch started the whole thing". I, of course, claim to have been asleep at the hotel the entire time. And since I had paid in cash, cellphones and CCTV didn't exist there was no physical evidence that I had ever been there. Everyone else got 30 days extra duty and I got a stern "talking to" by our LT.

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 26 at 2016 4:25 PM

MSG Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 26 Feb 2016 16:25:49 -0500

While stationed at Kadena Okinawa as a munitions troop, I once assisted the weapons guys at the de-arm area at the end of the runway. An F-105 came in from Japan and we proceeded to start the de-arm process, one of which was for the pilot to open the bomb bay doors to check for ordinance. The pilot refused several times, and after being threatened, he finally opened the doors. Inside were six Kawasaki motorcycles. We cleared him and sent him on his way. AS Sgt Shultz would say "we know nothing", Where the bikes wound up, who knows.

Response by MSgt Steven Holt, NRP, CCEMT-P made Feb 26 at 2016 10:41 PM

MSgt Steven Holt, NRP, CCEMT-P — Fri, 26 Feb 2016 22:41:06 -0500

I was a young SrA assigned to the Horn of Africa section at HQ USCENTCOM J2 during Operation Restore Hope/Continue Hope. We were having a not so busy day (for once!) in the duty section and were cutting up and telling jokes. Apparently, the levity got to me a bit much as the secure phone began ringing. Being the closest member to it, I made a quick grab for the receiver:

Me: "City fire house, you light it, we fight it! How may I help you?"
From the receiver I hear: "Uh, Airman Holt, this is General Hughes. Would you tell the LtCol (who was our section commander) to come to my office. You can come too"

You have no idea how thankful I am that man has a sense of humor!

Response by 1LT Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 27 at 2016 1:20 PM

1LT Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 27 Feb 2016 13:20:36 -0500

So there I was, no shit, in the middle of field exercises and we're having a leaders meeting, E6 and above. Commander and 1SG just back from the BUB ready to put some knowledge down on us. Just before the meeting I watched my 1SG try to belittle my smoke, so I was already in a very angry mood when the meeting started. I was the 1st Platoon PL/XO so ammo is my baby in the field. Apparently BN had an issue with the other batteries Fing up their ammo counts. So 1SG asks me the count. I give it, shell/fuze/prop/and yes even fing primers. He tells me to be sure and recount it, which I had done directly before the meeting with the ammo section and each gun. So I said, my numbers are solid, checked and verified. So he said something to the effect of well I Don trust your numbers, so check it again. To which I knife handed my 1SG, and thanked him for assuming that I don't know how to do my job(3rd year as a PL, 2nd one stateside, 1 deployed), and that perhaps he'd rather be the one trooping the line, rather than making px runs and being late with the chow...no one knew what to do...but the commander kept the meeting going...in a word...it made me an instant legend

Response by MCPO Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 27 at 2016 7:50 PM

MCPO Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 27 Feb 2016 19:50:20 -0500

I was working at the Coast Guard's Ninth District HQ (basically Division/Base/Fort HQ) with a small exchange on our floor, so Coast Guard Auxiliary members would CONSTANTLY be visiting (old military wannabes with WAY too much money and a mighty sense of entitlement). We'd get a half-dozen stopping in every day because they didn't know how to read signs directing them to the Exchange.

Cue the day when this sawed off guy in civvies comes in and starts asking questions. I was an E-5 and my buddy was an E-6, and this guy was polite and seemed happy enough, so we stopped work and shot the breeze with him for about 20 minutes. He turned out to be REALLY nice, and as he looked at his watch and said that he had to go. We volunteered, "Oh, the Exchange is down at the opposite corner of this floor, you can't miss it."

He looked at us a bit funny, and said, "Oh, I have a meeting with the boss. I'm Jim Hull, the new Admiral."

He departed and my buddy and I spent ten minutes trying to figure out if we had stepped on our collective dicks during the conversation. Turns out we didn't, and Admiral Hull was a hell of a boss.

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 28 at 2016 4:22 AM

SPC Private RallyPoint Member — Sun, 28 Feb 2016 04:22:02 -0500

When I was in the guard last summer, we had a MWR/Mando fun day at a bowling alley with a very open bar and staff I can only assume thought we were all 21.
After several beers, cheap shots, and terrible bowling, my buddy and I went out to smoke. My buddy is a lightweight, the kind of guy who smells the cap and gets buzzed. As we light our smokes and start to bs, out walks our BCSM (we were HHB). We immediately go to parade rest. Which is the only part of the etiquette we got right. Over the next 3 minutes my buddy calls him sir, dude, and sergeant, holding a smoke in one hand and a Pabst in the other. I nudged and at one point smacked my buddy, but he was so far up his own ass, he didn't get it. I got all the dirty looks and he ended up getting an award from that SMITH later that day, still drunk.

Response by SGT Mathew Husen made Feb 28 at 2016 11:51 AM

SGT Mathew Husen — Sun, 28 Feb 2016 11:51:08 -0500

Response by SPC Greg Burnett made Feb 28 at 2016 7:48 PM

SPC Greg Burnett — Sun, 28 Feb 2016 19:48:15 -0500

I don't drink and was driving another guy's Jeep POV back from a day off at a nearby lake. Other guys were all drunk and it was after dark. I did not know that they were throwing empty bottles at oncoming cars.
Got back to post and were met by highway patrol, 1st sergeant, CSM....
Not good. Not good.

Response by TSgt Melissa Post made Mar 1 at 2016 2:29 AM

TSgt Melissa Post — Tue, 01 Mar 2016 02:29:48 -0500

Doing drill practice in Lackland during the summer. Although I was raised in Texas and had spent the past 6+ years living there without air conditioning, this particular day was getting to me. I needed water and I needed it bad. I was trying to determine was it worth the guts to ask for permission to break rank and get some. I felt myself losing ability to press on and knew if I didn't ask soon, I would be hitting the concrete. Ok, it's worth it. "Sir, Trainee Chiles reports as ordered" "What?!" "Permission to break rank to grab my canteen." He halted the flight. Looked over at the flags for the temperature rating. OH CRAP, black flag. We shouldn't have even been out there. He at-ease marched us to grab our gear and then get back to the squadron building.

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 2 at 2016 5:30 PM

MSG Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 02 Mar 2016 17:30:54 -0500

A scary "Oh Crap". ....I was the Supply Sgt, so I had access to the CO's jeep. We were on a field exercise at Ft Drum, and I had to make a self service run into the cantonment area. On the way back, I stopped at an empty barracks to take a quick shower. I placed the soap in the soap dish without paying attention. Someone had put a double edged razor blade in the soap dish and it suck to the bottom of my soap. I started washing and noticed a little blood, so I immediately stopped. Thank God mama taught me to wash from the top down. "Ouch"