What is the hardest thing in communication for you to do?

2015-12-20T08:50:38-05:00

In philosophy we learn from Aristole and his quote:

"Anyone can become angry. That is easy. But to be angry with the right person to the right degree at the right time for the right purpose and in the right way, that is not easy."

Basic communication is for things: Sender, Receiver, message and feedback.

Response by Sgt Aaron Kennedy, MS made Dec 20 at 2015 10:01 AM

2015-12-20T10:01:27-05:00

Attempting to not appear a condescending an unsympathetic #%^ when discussing issues in a logical format, even if I agree with a person. Just because things are Personal, doesn't make them Important. Just because they are Important doesn't mean they should be Emotional.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 20 at 2015 10:08 AM

2015-12-20T10:08:25-05:00

Not editing my work. In written communication we have become more articulate observers of speech use, therefore we have become much more attuned to reading the subtle messages in written in speech. Communicating, sometimes exclusively through written communication, our tone, grammar and spell checking is very important, conveys a message, and is a reflection of who we are. I am very aware of this and yet I sometimes hurry through my messages not paying attention to the fact that spell checker changed their to there or some other similar grammatical change.

The hardest thing for me to do if a trigger is hit is to continue to communicate. I withdraw, stop communicating. Not communicating speaks volumes. Remember you cannot unbreathe a breath, unspeak a word, unremember...and neither can the receiver.

Response by SFC Pete Kain made Dec 20 at 2015 10:09 AM

2015-12-20T10:09:53-05:00

Keeping focus and not getting sidetracked.

Response by CPT Jack Durish made Dec 20 at 2015 12:57 PM

2015-12-20T12:57:56-05:00

Debating with unskilled debaters is my greatest challenge. I have always tried to follow the advice of Dr. Richard Rogers (On Becoming A Person) in using "creative arguing". That is, I cannot make my counter argument until I have repeated the opposing viewpoint in my own words to the satisfaction of my opponent. In that way I have assured the other person that they have been heard and understood. Sadly, when you attempt to be reasonable, you end up in an unfair fight: It's you and your opponent versus you). They have no qualms in attacking without consideration for the validity of anything you may have offered.

Response by SSG Warren Swan made Dec 20 at 2015 2:52 PM

2015-12-20T14:52:12-05:00

Resisting the urge to slap the dog crap out of that ONE person who thinks he/she knows more than the briefer, tries to take over the class, and is usually arrogantly wrong. This person usually waits until it's close to the time where the class is over, and then begins his tirade of nothingness.

Response by LTC Stephen F. made Dec 20 at 2015 4:51 PM

2015-12-20T16:51:44-05:00

SFC Stephen King from my perspective, the hardest thing in communication is to help somebody change their mind about something they are sure is correct without making them angry.

Response by SGT Patrick Reno made Dec 20 at 2015 5:28 PM

2015-12-20T17:28:31-05:00

It is hard to communicate with an employee, when the whole time you are talking to them they just stare at you like one of the walking dead. They tell you they understand what you are saying, then turn around and do the exact opposite. It is hard not to become frustrated and mad. One thing I have always told myself is never fire some one when you are mad. Always wait and cool down then if you still need to you do it.

Response by LTC David S. Chang, ChFC®, CLU® made Dec 20 at 2015 5:41 PM

2015-12-20T17:41:24-05:00

There are two main things that I see are hurdles to proper communication: 1. Personalities and 2. impersonal communication such as email, texts, and sometimes phone.

When it comes to personalities, there are sometimes dominant vs non-dominant, extorovert vs introvert, etc personalities where people don't feel comfortable getting clarification or telling the truth. I see this often when an overbearing boss just barks orders and subordinates are too afraid to speak up when it is needed. Culture can play a role too. For the second, body-language and tone make up 2/3 of conversations that you can't see through in emails and texts. This leads to miscommunication sometimes.

Response by SGM Mikel Dawson made Dec 20 at 2015 10:19 PM

2015-12-20T22:19:06-05:00

One thing which helped me was my move to Denmark. Speaking to people in English who's first language is not English made me stop and think how I was saying something. It also taught me to slow down and think about what I was saying before I said it. This carried over into my military career. I learned how not to use the big words, get to the point quickly, cleanly.

Response by COL Charles Williams made Dec 21 at 2015 9:11 AM

2015-12-21T09:11:28-05:00

Listen.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 21 at 2015 10:11 AM

2015-12-21T10:11:14-05:00

Having someone do something I don't agree with and they don't want to do it. That's a tough communication sell.

Response by SGT Jose Perdelia-Torres made Dec 21 at 2015 7:00 PM

2015-12-21T19:00:21-05:00

Listen to what the other guy has to say...

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 22 at 2015 9:00 AM

2015-12-22T09:00:45-05:00

my 1sg and I are both MRTs and were asked about our take away from it at a school last week. We both agreed we don't always bring are best selves and best qualities to the table depending on the situation, you can be one way at work all day and then your home or in another situation and your not trying to be on your "A game ", it's easy in certain situations to have rigid ways of thinking and subpar communication if your not trying to tune in with your good qualities.

Response by CPT John M. O'Connor made Dec 22 at 2015 6:20 PM

2015-12-22T18:20:06-05:00

To me it is how we need to respond differently to other cultures and the different generations in the workforce - technology, five generations in, etc. Great question.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 23 at 2015 12:12 AM

2015-12-23T00:12:59-05:00

For me, it was running the TMC in JRTC, and explaining SGMs how communications existed, and they could not be contacted via their personal cellphone, and say too much about medical conditions of soldiers. For hippa and SOPs sake. I stood my ground, and was backed by my COC

Response by SSG Rafael Rodriguez made Feb 27 at 2020 1:55 AM

2020-02-27T01:55:52-05:00

Always close the loop, AAR.

Response by SMSgt Bob W. made Nov 4 at 2021 12:03 AM

2021-11-04T00:03:12-04:00

“ I know you think you understand what you thought I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.”

― Alan Greenspan

BOTTOM LINE: Listen, then repeat the instructions back in your own words. You will be surprise at people who say they DID NOT say that.