What is the hardest thing about serving the military?

2015-04-10T05:50:15-04:00

What is (or was) the hardest or most difficult thing for you about serving in the military?

Response by CSM Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 10 at 2015 5:53 AM

2015-04-10T05:53:52-04:00

Watching my son deploy to Afghanistan right after I got back from an Iraq deployment.

Response by CW3 Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 10 at 2015 8:23 AM

2015-04-10T08:23:55-04:00

Time spent away from family!

Response by PO1 Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 10 at 2015 8:59 AM

2015-04-10T08:59:29-04:00

No different from others: away from fam :-(
Love you too, mom!

Response by SFC Douglas Davis made Apr 10 at 2015 9:14 AM

2015-04-10T09:14:20-04:00

Saying Goodbye to my family when I was recalled from Christmas leave for Desert Storm.

Response by CPT Bob Moore made Apr 10 at 2015 9:57 AM

2015-04-10T09:57:55-04:00

For me it was watching my brother deploy to Iraq after I had. I felt like I had some control when I was over there (even if I didn't) but I felt completely helpless knowing I could do absolutely nothing when he was over there.

Response by MSgt Jamie Lyons made Apr 10 at 2015 10:07 AM

2015-04-10T10:07:04-04:00

Leaving my family, especially my kids who always cried. Also the reunion as strange as that sounds. As much as I was gone we had learned to be independent. When I would return we had to adjust to be in each others life again.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 10 at 2015 10:17 AM

2015-04-10T10:17:12-04:00

Being away from my family.

Response by MSgt James Mullis made Apr 10 at 2015 10:28 AM

2015-04-10T10:28:30-04:00

The bureaucracy (i.e. idiocy) that occurs at most if not all levels. I was called the day of my dads funeral and told that I was being deployed to Desert Storm in two weeks. When I found someone who volunteered to switch rotations with me (take my place), I was told NO by a MAJCOM civilian who stated "I should have taken emergency leave rather than regular leave and it was my own tough luck". The reality is he was to lazy to do the necessary paperwork.

I experienced several instances where other bureaucrats refused to do the right thing because regulation or policy said XYZ and how could you possibly want YXZ. I learned early on in my career that with enough senior leadership support...there can always be an exception to policy. I spent a good part of my career and got a great deal of enjoyment from bucking policy and goading bureaucrats into doing the right thing.

Response by SGT(P) Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 10 at 2015 10:38 AM

2015-04-10T10:38:27-04:00

CH (MAJ) William Beaver beside being far from home, joining late and had BCT with 18-21 years old immature kids, that was tough, I felt back to high school.

Response by SSG Trevor S. made Apr 10 at 2015 10:49 AM

2015-04-10T10:49:41-04:00

Learning the taste of my own tongue from keeping it in my mouth it when it would have normally been wagging in the wind.

Response by LCpl Jason Morla made Apr 10 at 2015 2:32 PM

2015-04-10T14:32:32-04:00

Politics

Response by SFC Joe S. Davis Jr., MSM, DSL made Apr 10 at 2015 9:53 PM

2015-04-10T21:53:36-04:00

CH (MAJ) William Beaver Adapting and overcoming the civilian world to military in the beginning stages and reversing the scenario going from military to civilian life-retirement stage. Wow its weird- you will always be changed. What a odyssey called DUTY HONOR COUNTRY!

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 10 at 2015 9:59 PM

2015-04-10T21:59:45-04:00

As far as the non-military side of things, being away from my wife when deployed, TDY, or in training, for military related I'd have to say dealing with favoritism when I was a junior enlisted.

Response by SrA Cee Hart made Apr 10 at 2015 10:04 PM

2015-04-10T22:04:44-04:00

Missing my family

Response by SCPO Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 10 at 2015 10:07 PM

2015-04-10T22:07:28-04:00

Leaving the family behind.

Response by Lt Col Jim Coe made Apr 11 at 2015 3:44 PM

2015-04-11T15:44:34-04:00

1. Family separations
2. Taking leave is a sign of weakness

Response by CPL Timothy Bell made Apr 13 at 2015 5:46 PM

2015-04-13T17:46:25-04:00

Being stationed at Ft. Wainwright, AK. I grew to love it though an I miss it terribly.....at times.

Response by SGT(P) Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 13 at 2015 5:49 PM

2015-04-13T17:49:46-04:00

When I go on a deployment my young son always asks, "Daddy why do you always have to keep leaving me and Mommy"? "Do you not like living with us"? It tears me up every time.

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 13 at 2015 5:56 PM

2015-04-13T17:56:01-04:00

having to go the range and shoot... like omg why? haha all jokes aside. What everybody else is saying being away from friends and family

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 13 at 2015 6:24 PM

2015-04-13T18:24:45-04:00

Contrails? The Channel Lock Monster? :)

Response by Col Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 13 at 2015 7:16 PM

2015-04-13T19:16:23-04:00

The hardest thing for me, and my family, is leaving friends behind when we PCS. Thankfully we are able to maintain those friendships and make new ones at the new duty stations.

Response by SFC Mark Merino made Apr 13 at 2015 7:28 PM

2015-04-13T19:28:57-04:00

I hope they make this a command discussion. There are some great stories coming out of this thread.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 13 at 2015 8:28 PM

2015-04-13T20:28:18-04:00

leaving family behind for my deployment. You know you'll miss them, but you do not realize just how much you miss the little things....

Response by SFC Stephen King made Apr 13 at 2015 8:29 PM

2015-04-13T20:29:05-04:00

1. Missing Family 2. Tact: learning and teaching 3. Learning and sharing personal growth through failure and success 4. Realization of what is controllable and what is not. 5. Rejuvenation

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Apr 13 at 2015 8:37 PM

2015-04-13T20:37:45-04:00

Working for a toxic prick.

Response by SPC Angel Guma made Apr 13 at 2015 11:06 PM

2015-04-13T23:06:54-04:00

Toxic leaders.

Response by SGT Kristin Wiley made Apr 13 at 2015 11:09 PM

2015-04-13T23:09:20-04:00

That's easy, knowing regulations but getting the experience of never having regulations be followed by your leaders. Then spending your whole career fighting tooth and nail to get regulations to be followed so other soldiers don't have to live through what you've dealt with. Realizing that regulations mean nothing, intent means nothing, and that if there is a self-serving answer available 90% of the military will choose that option first. So basically, spending 6 years figuring out that EVERYTHING the military says it stands for, it doesn't; except for a small minority who are trying to uphold ETHICAL and LEGAL standards.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 13 at 2015 11:29 PM

2015-04-13T23:29:33-04:00

Being away from my wife during deployments, training, etc. It has put stress on our marriage and reintegrating has been difficult in the past. I still wouldn't trade it for the world, but it has been quite difficult at times.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 13 at 2015 11:38 PM

2015-04-13T23:38:18-04:00

The lack of common sense always astounded me, the large egos that cannot listen to reason and finally Camp Hovey, ROK

Response by CPL JeMario Laurie made Apr 13 at 2015 11:56 PM

2015-04-13T23:56:01-04:00

I would have to say leaving family also. It only got harder on my second deployment since my wife had our first child right before I left.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 14 at 2015 4:17 PM

2015-04-14T16:17:21-04:00

Missing my family when deployed or away for training.

The lack of control or decision making one has with the way we want our careers to shape out. We can only adapt to the crap thrown at us.

Common sense not being very common.

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 14 at 2015 4:47 PM

2015-04-14T16:47:23-04:00

1) Needing to go on sick call but having a 1SG view you as malingering if a limb is not falling off

2) Sleeping on cots.

Response by SFC Joe S. Davis Jr., MSM, DSL made Apr 14 at 2015 6:22 PM

2015-04-14T18:22:24-04:00

Without a doubt it was the deployments and the PCS moves constantly moving! It was always reinventing myself for the next unit(adapt and overcome) to survive and fulfill Duty Honor Country!

Response by CW2 Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 14 at 2015 7:29 PM

2015-04-14T19:29:54-04:00

I'd have to say the hardest thing is saying goodbye to family. leaving your spouse and children, never gets any easier. Long hours, crazy work schedules and constant TDY are easy to deal with compared to deploying and missing an entire year of your child's life.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 14 at 2015 8:44 PM

2015-04-14T20:44:08-04:00

The hardest thing for me is balancing my responsibilities with my full time job. It gets tough to keep up when you have an AGR Battalion Commander and all of the other Company Commanders are either ADOS, Technicians, or AGR. They have a lot more time to devote to their duties as full-time guardsmen than I do.

Response by SFC James Watters made Apr 22 at 2015 1:49 PM

2015-04-22T13:49:28-04:00

Making the decision to retire. That had to have been the hardest thing about the military. Being deployed or away from family for 16 years (+) out of 20 years, that became habitual and an expectation.

Response by TSgt Chip Dollason made Apr 23 at 2015 3:05 AM

2015-04-23T03:05:16-04:00

Plain and Simple - POLITICS!!!! As well as Officers more concerned about their careers than doing the right thing.

Response by TSgt Chip Dollason made Apr 23 at 2015 3:10 AM

2015-04-23T03:10:56-04:00

Well, I'd have to say retiring too.

Response by PO2 Sam Choe made Apr 23 at 2015 4:00 AM

2015-04-23T04:00:58-04:00

Duty weekend.. ruins all your plans

Response by TSgt Mario Guajardo made Apr 24 at 2015 1:10 PM

2015-04-24T13:10:18-04:00

The death of people you worked with. Witnessing the death of comrades in arms even if you didn't know them...and that's not even due to war....

Response by 1SG Jason Smith made May 28 at 2015 5:56 PM

2015-05-28T17:56:59-04:00

making the decision to retire

Response by TSgt Mario Guajardo made Jun 4 at 2015 10:34 PM

2015-06-04T22:34:29-04:00

Serving....duh

Response by PO1 Glenn Boucher made Sep 25 at 2015 2:16 PM

2015-09-25T14:16:25-04:00

The uncertainty of sudden deployments and how quickly your routine can get all messed up.

Response by 1SG Michael Blount made Sep 28 at 2015 9:17 AM

2015-09-28T09:17:23-04:00

CH - At first blush, I'd say it depends on whether you're talking about the peacetime or wartime military. Peacetime Army the toughest thing is putting up with the endless (and pointless briefings and death by PowerPoint). Mobilized Army - toughest thing is remembering why you're there and your role in the overall mission. Sometimes things get so microscopic that one loses the forest for the trees.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Sep 28 at 2015 12:50 PM

2015-09-28T12:50:26-04:00

The moral courage to tell the truth knowing you will get hammered.

Response by CW5 Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 14 at 2015 10:00 AM

2015-10-14T10:00:44-04:00

I say it's deployments and separation from family. And I'll bet I'm not alone on this one.

Response by MSgt Jim Wolverton made Oct 14 at 2015 2:06 PM

2015-10-14T14:06:43-04:00

Retiring was the hardest thing I had to do, broke my heart.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 14 at 2015 2:37 PM

2015-10-14T14:37:54-04:00

1. Losing your soldiers, friends, brothers in combat.
2. Missing so much of the best times in my kids lives.
3. Retiring and leaving it behind.

Response by MSgt Curtis Ellis made Oct 14 at 2015 2:56 PM

2015-10-14T14:56:44-04:00

Dealing with the loss of ones I help to send off who did not come back.

Response by SGT Bryon Sergent made Oct 14 at 2015 3:59 PM

2015-10-14T15:59:14-04:00

I fortunately have not experienced the loss of a friend or Team member to combat. To those that have my heart feels for you and wish you the best. and hope that you can remember the good time that you had together as comrades. The fact that my spouse has no idea how or what the organization is no matter how many times I explain it. She thinks it is a JOB because I am in the National Guard. " Well, we don't have the money to get you there this month, You will have to stay here!" for example. No matter how I explain it to her she just doesn't understand that I just can't call and say well I can make it in this month maybe next! or that I am sick and cant go, or that my pay is screwed up and "Just call HR and fix it" or just speak to the commander and he will understand!

Response by Cpl Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 14 at 2015 4:51 PM

2015-10-14T16:51:36-04:00

Leaving...

Response by PO1 Glenn Boucher made Nov 4 at 2015 4:15 PM

2015-11-04T16:15:36-05:00

Holidays while deployed underway on the ship. Hard to get into the holiday spirit at that time.

Response by PO3 Don Dennis made Jul 31 at 2017 5:12 PM

2017-07-31T17:12:09-04:00

Separation from family

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 3 at 2018 4:36 AM

2018-02-03T04:36:34-05:00

For me, its having to leave your family for months at a time....my husband and i had been married for about 3 years, and we had a 6 month old. Needless to say, i went play in the sandbox for a little bit, and we didn't live under the same roof again until my daughter was five years old. Yep...thats by far the most difficult thing I've ever had to do!!!

Response by LTC David Brown made Nov 3 at 2021 7:18 AM

2021-11-03T07:18:38-04:00

Of course the unaccompanied overseas tours/ deployments and constant PCS moves. Professionally it was maintaining two careers, active duty military career and civilian career as a Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist.

Response by SMSgt Bob W. made Nov 3 at 2021 11:56 PM

2021-11-03T23:56:41-04:00

SIMPLE. Putting up with Lifers who know it all [they think]. Most of them couldn't pour pee out of a boot with instructions on the heel.