What is the greatest adversity you faced in your time in the military? How did you get through it, and how do you look back on it now?

2015-07-02T23:35:49-04:00

Response by Capt Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 2 at 2015 11:39 PM

2015-07-02T23:39:55-04:00

Easy. Our own government, beurocracy, rampant spending, populous, and low troop morale.

Response by COL Charles Williams made Jul 3 at 2015 1:05 AM

2015-07-03T01:05:32-04:00

For me... Easy, being falsely accused of crime and investigated by the DAIG (after 25 years in the Army), and being flagged for close to 39 months... For a referred OER I gave to a LT who sexually assaulted a woman (actually there were more than one we found out later). It careened into EO, and finally a DAIG whistleblower reprisal case. It started in Apr 05 and was finally thrown out by the DODIG in Aug 08, and I was promoted to Colonel 19 months late on 28 Sep 08. The DODIG said "the DAIG erred and their witnesses were all less than credible."

I got through it with a lot of faith, a core of supporters - peer, friends and bosses (who stuck with me based on my reputation alone), and because I have the most supportive wife and family ever. My boss at the time, in the worst times, also helped me keep faith, patience, and trust, and even made my laugh at my myself when I needed it most.

When all was restored, except the time I lost in limbo, another great mentor told me the hardest thing I would have to do, was not be vindictive. He said being vindictive would hurt me much more than the objects of my disdain. So, I smothered the culprits with kindness.

Response by CW4 Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 3 at 2015 1:32 AM

2015-07-03T01:32:34-04:00

For me, it was a series of serious injuries that had temporarily sideline me from physical activity and almost caused me to be medically discharged each time. In 2010, while deployed, I tore parts of my chest muscle and shoulder and had to have surgery and physical therapy for up to 10 months. In 2012, I tore my quad and total recovery time was 11 months. In 2013, I tore my calf and Achilles' tendon, total recovery time 10 more months. Each time the Army wanted me to take a med board. I was upset and I couldn't figure out why my body was failing me after all these years of being in peak physical condition. I almost gave up the last time, but with some advice from family, friends, peers and leaders, I decided to work hard and get back into gear and now I am running 5-10 miles 4-5 times a week and I feel great.

Response by SFC Stephen King made Jul 3 at 2015 7:56 AM

2015-07-03T07:56:14-04:00

Bouncing back from both physical and mental challenges. Specifically, a completely torn biceps muscle.

Response by CAPT Kevin B. made Jul 3 at 2015 10:50 AM

2015-07-03T10:50:59-04:00

Myself. There was a time I though I liked a very very dark side. Took a lot to put that Dragon into a cage. Took 17 years before I could even talk to my wife about it.

Response by PO2 Steven Erickson made Jul 3 at 2015 11:04 AM

2015-07-03T11:04:49-04:00

Something in the submarine service known as the "Law of Conservation of Happiness"

"Law of Conservation of Happiness: Once a submarine’s hatches shut, the amount of happiness onboard is fixed. Happiness can neither be created nor destroyed, only shifted from one body to another. ERGO, the only way to add to your own happiness is to take it from someone else."

This attitude - selfish self-preservation of mental and emotional stability - was very difficult to unlearn. My wife and my faith did both, but it took a decade.

Paraphrased from Foxtrot Alpha: http://foxtrotalpha.jalopnik.com/even-more-wacky-submarine-terms-you-never-knew-you-want [login to see]

Even More Wacky Submarine Terms You Never Knew You Wanted To Know

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Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Jul 3 at 2015 12:02 PM

2015-07-03T12:02:37-04:00

It was getting PTSD which meant my career was over. It was troubling as this was the only vocation I knew, but the government gave me a fair shake when I retired.

Response by SFC Mark Merino made Jul 3 at 2015 2:39 PM

2015-07-03T14:39:04-04:00

Great question and very appropriate for this forum 1LT(P) Private RallyPoint Member. I can think of several contenders, each seemed like the hardest but became replaced by others much more severe. The first time I lost a brother in combat was very hard because we were just a tiny air cav troop and us cav folks tend to remain extremely tight even decades later. We lost 2 in the last couple of weeks in our tour. That was in 2004 and since then I have lost too many to count. In 2007 we lost 14 in just one day (Blackhawk went down in Mosul). By that time I was practically numb and just cold-hearted. I couldn't feel joy or love, but I could feel hate and anger. But very selfishly, I think the loss of my career at 18.5 years had the greatest impact on me. Forced medical retirement after that much time and experiencing that much loss along the way really put the zap on me. I was in the hospital for months getting put back together and I begged the nurse to just smother me with a pillow. The pain was a 10/10 made so not just from the wounds, but the emotional pain and anxiety as well. The wife had taken everything in the house, the only vehicle, and the checkbook and bailed, so getting out of the hospital and getting home meant nothing. The combination f physical and emotional pain changed me. I was just a numb sack of meat waiting to die for years. I found that the family relocated to the Phoenix area (most likely because I said I would rather die than live in the desert). I moved there in a uhaul and stayed alone in a dirt field on a peach farm isolated in a delapidated trailer with no tv, no radio, no toilet, no fridge, no money, and no hope just so I could be 5 miles from the ex family and so my 3 kids knew I wanted to desperately be in their lives. But the ex moved there to shack up with her newest source of income and squeeze him dry. I had no ties to the military anymore, no family, but I ALWAYS had whikey. That eventually led me to a super extreme DUI and 45 days in the pokey. That finally got Phoenix to send me to the PTSD residential program in Menlo Park, CA (after begging to go for 2 years). I spent 4 months there. The therapy was too personal to broadcast, but I was there for 4 months so let's just say I was a wreck. I learned to just let go of all the anger I had inside of me once I gave mysef to the Lord and admitted there was no way I could do this alone. My last drink was 4 DEC 2011. That was 3.5 years ago and that man is dead. Never give up. When things are so bad that you believe there is never a way out, you will look back on that experience and hopefully be the better for it. You will certainly learn a lot about what kind of person you are. Use your pain to get in touch with that empathetic person inide of you and help others thru their low points. You will be a force of incredible influence on someone who thinks things can never get better. Stay away from the self medicating. Deal with the problem head on and sober or you will become stuck in life. God Bless. Respectfully, Uncle Mark

Response by SSG Red Hoffman made Jul 3 at 2015 2:54 PM

2015-07-03T14:54:30-04:00

When I divorced from my wife after almost 13 years of faithful service, we split and she left me with the three kids while stationed in Alaska. It took the Army and my 'wonderful' chain of command less than 30 days to have me riding a Chapter 5 discharge due to parental responsibilities against my will. I had no choice and no support from my chain of responsibility....it was the most miserable days of my life. How did I get through it? I almost didn't. I actually got to the point where I considered suicide. It was right after I went to file for my unemployment claim and was given the third degree from this big woman who tried to make it sound like I was doing nothing to get employment. I left that office thinking life was over. Luckily, my oldest son (then 8 years old) realized how I was feeling and looked me in the eye and told me he was not afraid...that he knew I would take care of him and his brother and sister. I broke down in tears. I did bounce back, because of that, but I still hold very angry grudges against two individuals who were key in the race to chapter me out. If I run into them today...even after 25 years, I don't think I would be able to control myself. I still and probably always will harbor negative feelings for them. I have been taking anti-depressants since my discharge in 1989, yet the VA still has yet to approve a service connection for mental issues. This is upsetting to even write.....

Response by LTC Bink Romanick made Jul 3 at 2015 9:07 PM

2015-07-03T21:07:42-04:00

When I was diagnosed with a neurological disease at Walter Reed in 91 and permanently profiled. I was re classed into the Comptroller field and away from tanks.

I knew that I was off the command list and off the War College list and that everything that I had worked for was over. I knew that COL was a reality that wasn't going to happen.

I studied the comptroller field and maintained some semblance of being a soldier, but it was never the same. I even got promoted to LTC but it wasn't the same. I am stuck in a wheelchair today.