Is it possible to disagree with a lifestyle but still support the right to live that lifestyle?

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 30 Jun 2015 16:49:05 -0400

I have two distinct belief systems.

1) I have a belief system that is influenced by my faith and gives me a moral compass to follow. It is a personal belief system that I do not hold against anyone else. I measure myself against it as, in the end, I will be accountable for myself.

2) A belief system that states everyone has a right to their own belief system including moral standards and has a right to act in accordance with their belief system as long as it does not affect anyone else.

Essentially I don't have to agree with your lifestyle, but I do have to respect the fact that you choose to believe what you do and live how you choose.

I have spoken to many who believe that you cannot possibly have that kind of belief system. Essentially, if you believe a lifestyle is wrong, then you cannot believe another person has a right to live that way.

What do you say? Can you disagree with a lifestyle but still support one's right to live that way?

Please keep comments respectful and professional.

Response by LTC Stephen F. made Jun 30 at 2015 4:52 PM

LTC Stephen F. — Tue, 30 Jun 2015 16:52:46 -0400

Yes SSgt Private RallyPoint Member, it is possible. They are not mutually exclusive; but, are indeed challenging. Cognitive dissonance is believing two mutually exclusive beliefs at the same time under the same conditions.
As service people we were prepared to fight for the right of people to live freely including taking positions that we definitely did not support.

Response by LTC Bink Romanick made Jun 30 at 2015 5:05 PM

LTC Bink Romanick — Tue, 30 Jun 2015 17:05:47 -0400

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member I really don't have any feeling about the dichotomy except to say that I have no problem with what others do (if it's legal). Even though I don't participate in that behavior. I'm too old to judge.

Response by Sgt Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 30 at 2015 5:24 PM

Sgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 30 Jun 2015 17:24:02 -0400

I agree with you. I may not agree with a certain aspect of another's life but as long as I doesn't hurt me or any other person I see no reason to stop you or look down on you. I see it as the sandwich theory: if I go to subway and want a meatball sub but the person in front of me orders a tuna melt... why would I be mad at them for ordering something different, it doesn't affect my sandwich, it does me no harm, and it wont hurt anyone else by them ordering that sandwich.
So yes you can disagree with a certain part of someone's life but if there is no harm in it why stop them.

Response by Maj Chris Nelson made Jun 30 at 2015 5:28 PM

Maj Chris Nelson — Tue, 30 Jun 2015 17:28:26 -0400

I respect or not respect a person for who they are. If you are an ass, I don't respect you. If you are fair, and give me a reason to respect you, you will have my respect. How you live your life is up to you. I have had friends and neighbors that live alternate lifestyles (not mine, so therefore alternative). I have not been asked to participate in their lifestyle, I don't ask to participate in their lifestyle....and yet they are good people. I respect the person. Their life may not be the one I would choose for me, but I will not tell them they are wrong.

Response by Lt Col Timothy Parker, DBA made Jun 30 at 2015 5:33 PM

Lt Col Timothy Parker, DBA — Tue, 30 Jun 2015 17:33:43 -0400

Almost by definition, we all have a different lifestyle than anyone else since we all have different backgrounds and experiences. That said, while we may not differ substantially, we as military members fought for the right to be different (as long as that difference does not infringe on the rights of others). If we were all the same, life would be boring anyway. Just my humble opinion.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 30 at 2015 6:10 PM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 30 Jun 2015 18:10:17 -0400

I don't even understand how this can be an issue to be honest. I don't agree with many of the faith systems that so many have. But that shouldn't let me stop you from your faith. In the same way if one wants to live a life that is not in violation of any laws or diminishes anyone else's rights then I don't see the issue here.

Response by LCpl Steve Smith made Jun 30 at 2015 6:13 PM

LCpl Steve Smith — Tue, 30 Jun 2015 18:13:11 -0400

Yes Justyn A. you can. You do not have to choose between your Morals (Faith) and Supporting someone else's right to live their own lifestyle even if you do not agree with it. You are Supporting equality, and the Constitution of the United States, remember this? "I, _____, do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same. Even if it means we have to support someones rights we do not agree with personally like what these Numb Nutz are doing to our Flag. It sucks but they are allowed to desecrate it and active duty personnel can not do anything about it or face major repercussions. as you have surly seen on the news where Vets are being arrested and or cited for trying to stop people from stepping on it or burning it or any other form of desecration. I hope my entry helps you in your moral struggle.

Response by Sgt Aaron Kennedy, MS made Jun 30 at 2015 6:19 PM

Sgt Aaron Kennedy, MS — Tue, 30 Jun 2015 18:19:56 -0400

Sure. I am going to point out a very simple example of one.

I disagree with many of the concepts of Vegetarianism, however I support others Right to eat that way if they so desire. I understand it from an intellectual standpoint, but do not agree that it is the best course of action for myself.

I understand the Ethical, Moral, Dietary, and several other arguments. I agree with many of them. But it's just not for me.

I know this may seem like an "absurd" way to explain the concept, but sometimes using a different way to explain it, makes it easier to comprehend.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 30 at 2015 6:30 PM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 30 Jun 2015 18:30:35 -0400

I agree with #1. #2...I take issue with you word "support". I accept others rights, however, I don't support them. I don't think I'm playing with words, if I am I don't mean to.

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 30 at 2015 9:21 PM

MSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 30 Jun 2015 21:21:52 -0400

Of course it is.
If any one group of people should understand this concept it should be the folks on this site.
As a group we are forced to interact with far more different religions, background, socioeconomic levels....etc than any of our civilian counterparts. We are force to develop a tolerance for those who we disagree with at a base or core level but have to support because well to be honest they are not breaking any rules.
Depending on who you are this can range from not approving of the single parent, the "married" divorced couple who stay together for the BAH and kids, the E4 with the BMW who live in the dorms and can’t pay his phone bill, the E-8 dating the E3 from another squadron....you get my point.
As military members the concept of “let’s agree to disagree” is paramount to our success. Without it much like congress we would sit around on our asses getting tripped up trivial issues and failing to focus on and accomplish the mission.

Response by PO1 John Miller made Jul 1 at 2015 4:36 AM

PO1 John Miller — Wed, 01 Jul 2015 04:36:45 -0400

Absolutely. Just because you have your own belief system that works for you, doesn't mean that it would work for someone else nor would you have the right to force your beliefs on others, particularly those who aren't interested in it.

Response by Capt Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 1 at 2015 10:54 AM

Capt Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 01 Jul 2015 10:54:55 -0400

Of course. Most, if not all do it all the time. That is what freedom means. Others get to do what they want (if legal) regardless of how I feel.

Response by LCDR Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 24 at 2015 1:18 PM

LCDR Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 13:18:21 -0400

This question evokes some challenging ideas. In my humble opinion, If you truly believe something is wrong, then you believe it is universally wrong-and by logical process, cannot tacitly "support" someone's right to do "wrong".

However...

"Support" is a broad word. I do not "support" the 35 mph speed limit on the major roadway near my home because experience has informed me that 55 is an entirely acceptable speed for the average driver on that particular roadway. I also see that the 35 mph limit is a blatant attempt to gather more revenue through citations. None the less, I drive 35 mph there because I respect the law (and do not want to pay the ticket). The issue arises when (for extreme example-Draw what analogies you will) obeying the speed limit has a serious consequence. Say my passenger has a medical emergency, and I need to make it to the hospital as quickly as possible...I would choose to break the law for their greater good.

Constitutionally speaking, many of us swore oaths that included "support" of the founding principles of this nation, to include "rights" surrounding life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. I suppose the challenging aspect of this commitment is asking one's self whether or not a "right" truly supports these principles.

I believe that question cannot be answered without a base in morality. This is the root of so much debate now precisely because as a society, we do not agree on what is "moral". Perhaps the best one can do is respect the laws that give people the "right" to do as they please...but exercise one's own right to represent and promote a just and moral example.