I am having a nostalgia moment. I was thinking about the pork patty meal, and I almost barfed. What was the worst MRE you can remember?

Cpl Joshua Caldwell — Mon, 19 Dec 2016 10:23:27 -0500

Response by Maj Marty Hogan made Dec 19 at 2016 10:28 AM

Maj Marty Hogan — Mon, 19 Dec 2016 10:28:04 -0500

It was a tuna casserole thing- smelled horrible and tasted worse than it smelled.... the Chiclets were the saving grace...box f two I beleive

Response by 1SG(P) Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 19 at 2016 10:33 AM

1SG(P) Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 19 Dec 2016 10:33:30 -0500

- Any MRE prior to the era of each one having a heater; e.g. who wants a cold omelette?
- Hot dogs, a.k.a. "The Four Fingers of Death", because who eats hot dogs without mustard?

Response by CSM Michael J. Uhlig made Dec 19 at 2016 10:36 AM

CSM Michael J. Uhlig — Mon, 19 Dec 2016 10:36:03 -0500

It has to be the Chees & Veggie Omlet! As shared by my brothers at Gruntworks....

This is without a doubt the single most reviled MRE in existence. You squad leader has horror stories about getting five of them in the same deployment. Your Platoon Sergeant once killed a supply clerk for giving him a box with two of them in it. Your Platoon Leader… well, he’s probably going off the stories he heard because that buttery little boot **** is still pissing in his underoos and hasn’t been around long enough to understand the sheer hatred this “meal” inspires in those who had to endure it.

First of all, it’s a triple lie. It’s not a meal; It’s not ready; and you definitely can’t eat it. The best you can do is try and smother it in hot sauce until your senses are overwhelmed by cayenne pepper and you can’t tell if your tears are from your eyes burning or the taste of the MRE. Then later you get to experience the same effect as the Buffalo Chicken MRE, but this time you did it to yourself. Opening the entrée packet is like walking into a stale egg fart in a thrift store dressing room. Taking the first bite is like having a Waffle House fry cook taking a cold dump on your tongue after eating pickled eggs for 3 days. Chewing your way through the slimy piece of cold slop the consistency of Tempurpedic mattress foam is like your jaw reliving the Bataan Death March. Your best bet was to try and heat it up and then dump all the hot sauce and salt you could find on it, then wolf it down as fast as possible. Then you spent the rest of the week feeling like there was an alien larva inside you… like an alien face-hugger had stuck its ovipositor down your throat or you just kissed Hillary Clinton on the mouth. Either way once that thing was in you, you had to get it out as soon as possible. Just find a slit trench and breath through the contractions. It will all be over soon, one way or another…