How would you, as a leader, address a Service Member with gender identity issues?

Here's a question, and it's just a question. Nothing more.

Transgenders want to serve in the military. I get that.

However, why would they subject themselves to all of the negative aspects that have already been mentioned? Until the policy changes, it is what it is and they are unable to follow that policy.

I did know a few transgendered Sailors when I was in, and while I can't say for certain what was going on in their brains, I do know that they were able to keep their private life private, do their job, and act appropriately at work. I.e., dressing as the gender they were assigned at birth.

When I found out they were transgendered I didn't feel any differently about them, and honestly had no idea they were until they told me.

It is the devils way of pulling them off their path that God has for them. The devil is a liar, and a good one at that. I know one who wanted to change their sex and when they finally started opening up to me, they started to tell me how they do not feel attractive. That their insecurities about their body has made them feel not ‘sexy’ and she wanted to be a male. Its an attack from the devil but you have to look at them with understanding. Be a friend to them and let them open up to you. Don’t shove things down their throat. Let them talk. Get a real picture of what is going on inside. There are insecurities and they have been there for a long time. The devil will lie to you and it has taken a long time of lies to get to this point. Don’t push them any further by not listening.

I always used rank and last name, KISS... Don't dramatize this issue...

I would be open-minded. Probably ask if they need anything and ensure that the personal choice will not become a issue in reference to job performance. Personally, if they are a hard worker and can achieve the mission I am good to go.

With whatever support they need.

By the time this person comes to you his/her internal conflicts will have caused his/her work to suffer. Lack of attention to duties may prompt you to call the person in for counseling because he/she works directly for you or has been referred in by an NCO directly supervising. That may be the catalyst for coming out. Personally my only issue is if the person feels able to perform his/her assigned duties. If the answer is affirmative then send him/her back to work under close supervision. An entry should be made of the revelation and resolution and the person's immediate supervisor should receive a note of the proceedings.
Should work issues persist the person should be called in and reminded of his previous commitment to not allow this issue affect his/her work. Another promise to do better should not be accepted and the person should be referred up to higher leadership along with all notes taken of the encounters.
As NCOs we have a responsibility to all our charges and our mission, We cannot allow one person to detract from those obligations.

I'm so sorry but when it comes to stuff like this I better not have someone or man in front of me telling me that they want to be a woman. Seriously, all the stuff that we go through just being a woman. I believe seriously that people like that needs attention and a great deal of it at a church or a special care facility who help people out with those types of disorders. Now, on a personal note I would not want to deploy with someone that are having identity issues, if you don't know what sex you are or want to be there could be other underlining issues going on with that person.

Before answering you question I'd really like to weigh in on your response to your own question.

I hear or read people saying all to often, they are "open-minded", without actually understanding what that means. I am not saying you don't understand the use of the these words SSG McCarthy, but open mindedness does not mean accepting a particular liberal view on a topic (such as transgender, homosexuality, abortion and so on), it means having your own view and respecting all other views on the same topic, even those that oppose your own. By respecting the other view point and holding constructive conversation in regards, one exercises true open mindedness. All to often people try to use this term as a position or an end all to an argument ("your just not open minded"), no different then generalizing, assuming or using other non-logical statements to support an argument.

Now with that out of the way. If a SM came to me and told me they where suffering from gender identity I would direct them to see a mental health professional. Since gender identity issues is a disorder covered under mental health (http://www.ifge.org/302.85_Gender_Identity_Disorder_in_Adolescents_or_Adults), and since I am not a professional in that area, I would send them to someone who is.

I know I'm in the minority with this one because for me, personally I don't care! If your here to serve and you can do it in a professional manor I don't care which side your fly zips up! Now that being said I mean professional I will address you by rank i.e. Pvt, SGT, LT, doesn't matter what matters to me is the job. I know the guys in line units feel differently but if that's the case then a male with female gender issue shouldn't be assigned to a line unit. Not because of unit cohesion, but simply because their are no females in combat based infantry roles, period. So then that service member needs to change not only gender but their MOS, and if the position isn't available due to down sizing that's the risk they take,.. Ok now I'm jumping off this soap box and passing off the mike lol!

Remind the soldier that, at the moment, if they want gender-reassignment surgery that the military considers that grounds for dismissal from service. If they are being psychologically hampered by their current state, tell them to consider toughing it out to the end of their enlistment and using the money to save for their eventual transformation.

If they are not interested in the surgery, let them know that they are free to dress as the please and act as they please when off-duty, but that the usual standards of conduct apply and that there may be negative reaction from their peers. I wouldn't tolerate mistreatment of them because of any gender issue, but a rule enforced tomorrow morning is poor salve to a punch in the face the previous night.

I'd also ask if they felt this way before joining the military, and if so, what were their intentions in joining if they knew ahead of time?