How should I handle a grumpy Soldier?

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 05 Oct 2020 14:35:54 -0400

I have this female Specialist who is also a "quick starter," meaning she is pre-OCS. She works hard, gets the mission accomplished, but has a serious negative attitude. I recently put her in for her PCS award since she actually does bust her butt in the office. But lately her negativity/grumpiness is really annoying me. She literally has to announce every complaint that bothers her to the entire office. I'm fairly new to the office and the office long times seem to just ignore her when she acts that way. I have already given her time away from the office since she asked because she was burnt out. Should I engage with her and see what the issue is? Or at least attempt to see what her problem is?

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Oct 5 at 2020 2:40 PM

MAJ Ken Landgren — Mon, 05 Oct 2020 14:40:54 -0400

Definitely be candid about her deficiency. We don't want that behavior in soldiers or leaders.

Response by SGM Erik Marquez made Oct 5 at 2020 2:41 PM

SGM Erik Marquez — Mon, 05 Oct 2020 14:41:01 -0400

SFC Private RallyPoint Member IN a non-accusatory manner, neutral location away from other staff ears... Sure, I would. "Hey, noticed the office and staff really frustrating you these past few weeks I've been here... would like to know what the issue is . Cant help make it better if I don't know what is wrong"

Response by SSgt Christophe Murphy made Oct 5 at 2020 3:30 PM

SSgt Christophe Murphy — Mon, 05 Oct 2020 15:30:54 -0400

Yes, you should investigate further. I honestly don't see another feasible option.

Response by 1SG Dennis Hicks made Oct 5 at 2020 4:20 PM

1SG Dennis Hicks — Mon, 05 Oct 2020 16:20:56 -0400

I am going go a different way with this, maybe I am wrong or just plain stuck in the past. If this Soldier is a good performer, solid in her knowledge of her job and what is expected but failing with her "PEOPLE SKILLS" she needs to adjust her presentation so as not to alienate even folks that have nothing to do with her bad attitude. If someone in the office is pushing her button then that individual(s) needs to be dealt with. If this is just how she is when under pressure she needs to examine her methods of dealing with pressure before she commissioned or promoted. She needs to share what is causing her to act out like this before she is put in a position of leadership or she will fail down the line. If she doesn't adjust her tact at this stage she will only get worse when more pressure is heaped upon her. With only what you have supplied us, I would say she she is salvageable, because really who among us hasn't just had it up to here with someone to the point we just start nuking the area.

Response by CPT Lawrence Cable made Oct 5 at 2020 5:08 PM

CPT Lawrence Cable — Mon, 05 Oct 2020 17:08:52 -0400

On the civilian side, I had an employee that was the hardest working guy in my department, never missed, could be counted on to get things done correctly, but , using the infamous B word, he just bitched constantly about everything. After I had been there about a or so month, he asked to speak to me in private, where he proceeded to gripe about the situation in the world, the company, the local city and life in general. Anything to do with work I told him I would look into and into his solutions, and if that was all and if it was, go on back to work. I soon found that this was going to be a regular meeting, usually a couple of months went by before he had a enough gripes built up for another meeting, then he went back to work just like before. His work related comments were generally on target, or at least relevant, and he often had a well thought out solution. The rest of the general griping wasn't really focused that well, and I think he just need someone to vent to occasionally.
After I left that position, we became friends and hunting buddies until his death. He still complained about everything, so much so that some of his family had nicknamed him Bitchard (for Richard, of course).But my Master Sergeant Father always told me it was a soldier, sailor or airman's right to gripe about things. The point of that story is why don't you just take her in the office and ask her if she needs to get things out that are bothering her. If it's something that you can address, try to do so, if it's general I am not happy with the World, offer so sympathy and a ear to listen to her, then send her back to her duty. If it is effecting section efficiency, just ask her to bring it to you directly instead of venting in the section.
I had a Platoon Sergeant that had a similar attitude, but otherwise was a solid NCO. I listened to his gripe session everyone once in awhile, which isn't that big of a price to pay for a good performance. Like my daddy stated, soldiers are allowed to complain.

Response by SSG Dennis R. made Oct 5 at 2020 6:41 PM

SSG Dennis R. — Mon, 05 Oct 2020 18:41:54 -0400

A number of possible issues come to mind. Yes, I'd definitely check out what's going on with her.

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 5 at 2020 7:26 PM

MSG Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 05 Oct 2020 19:26:45 -0400

Find out what is causing her disdain. I mean, stellar performer but expressing issues. There is an underlying issue. As a Leader, it would behoove (and I really do hate that word) you to try and find the root cause.

Response by Lt Col Jim Coe made Oct 6 at 2020 8:12 AM

Lt Col Jim Coe — Tue, 06 Oct 2020 08:12:26 -0400

Council with the Spec4. Discus her positive and negative behaviors. See if she will let you know what her underlying problems are. Is she fearful of losing her position? Is she worried about OCS? How’s her physical health? Family worries?

Develop a plan to help her modify her behavior. Also help her with underlying problems if within scope of Army to support.

Set standards. Enforce standards. Report based on standards.

Response by MAJ Ronnie Reams made Oct 6 at 2020 9:40 AM

MAJ Ronnie Reams — Tue, 06 Oct 2020 09:40:07 -0400

If it is just normal complaining, that means you have a happy soldier, do not worry about it. When soldiers are not complaining, that is when you need to put your antennae up.

Response by SGT Larry Reed made Sep 20 at 2021 12:16 PM

SGT Larry Reed — Mon, 20 Sep 2021 12:16:05 -0400

I would kindly tell to write down the issues or problems on paper and submit this to you so you can keep this / these papers on file. She may stop complaining verbally if she has to proceed with what you ask. You are a busy person. Just imagine if you had to listen to all persons complaints.

Response by Sgt Dale Briggs made Sep 20 at 2021 3:04 PM

Sgt Dale Briggs — Mon, 20 Sep 2021 15:04:42 -0400

If your sick of her attitude guess what, so is everyone else in that office. Pre OCS? You need to straighten her out, your doing her a favor.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Jan 2 at 2024 2:46 PM

MAJ Ken Landgren — Tue, 02 Jan 2024 14:46:20 -0500

Counsel her. To be a good leader is to be a good follower.