How packed is your E-Bag?

2014-11-20T08:08:29-05:00

Licensed psychologist for both the VA and the USAF, Lt Col Private RallyPoint Member just posted this blog about our E-Bag (emotional baggage) that comes with returning home from deployment. Thoughts? Agree? Disagree?

http://projectsanctuary.us/?blog=e-bag

The E-Bag (Emotional Baggage)

"The E-Bag" - a blog by Lt. Col. (Dr.) David Tharp

Response by Maj Chris Nelson made Nov 20 at 2014 9:19 AM

2014-11-20T09:19:49-05:00

When I came back from Iraq, my E-Bag must have been jammed up pretty hard. My wife told me well after the fact that it took me about 1 year to "unwind" and return to nearly pre-deployment mentality (and for the record, I was a FOBIT, never left Balad AB, and worked at the Balad Theater Hospital...). The second deployment was to Afghanistan. I was there (and away from home) for a MUCH longer period of time. I traveled off the base 6 days out of 7, more danger, doing a totally different mission then when in Iraq. She told me after that one, that I "returned to nearly normal" in weeks..... well, except for my driving skills....she is still peeved at me on my new driving skills picked up over there! ;-) I DO believe there is a thread of truth in this BLOG. Some of it has to do with how the member deals with the issues, exactly what he/she did/saw, and other factors.

Response by SFC Mark Merino made Nov 20 at 2014 4:06 PM

2014-11-20T16:06:41-05:00

No one comes home the same. Anyone who goes through an experience so foreign to the normal day to day grind is aware of this. Even with help from therapy, medication, peers, family, and even prayer, things never go back to the way they were before. We learn to manage and accept the change. Innocence lost is just that....lost. Honesty is not always forthcoming. How do you get a group of dependants together and telling them that you can expect a,b,c and 1,2,3 when the service member returns? Unless the system has greatly changed since my departure (and Lord I hope it has) we teach how to identify the red flags of PTS and get the individual help when things go bad. So many times, the anger, resentments, and misunderstandings are already in full effect and the family is torn to pieces. Getting help for the individual after the family disintegrates is like saying "the operation was a success.....but the patient died." Divorce and multiple deployments is almost the norm. For service members who measure self-worth from having a successful marriage, this is devestating. Get to really know your service members. Know what makes them define themselves as "successful." Most importantly, know when their self-worth is threatened as situations change. You don't need a PhD in psychology to refer someone to mental health and tell them that "this is a person who lived and died to serve his country and he is facing an MEB now" or "this person is a strong family woman and her husband just left her." That insight can be invaluable to a therapist. Just my .02.....

Response by COL Jason Smallfield, PMP, CFM, CM made Nov 20 at 2014 4:19 PM

2014-11-20T16:19:00-05:00

Short answer is METT-TC. The emotional baggage that each service member brings back from a deployment is different for each person based upon a variety of contributing factors such as: personal resiliency, length of deployment, type of deployment, specific events that happened to or around a person while on deployment, severity of incident, etc. Like a song goes "some gave all, all gave some". The solution individually and organizationally is preparation prior to deployment, mitigation during deployment, and assessment/resources after deployment based upon need.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Nov 20 at 2014 6:29 PM

2014-11-20T18:29:58-05:00

LTC Jason Strickland , I think it is applicable to us all... that it is certainly loaded down. Some more than others. I personally deal with anxiety and occasional depression. The biggest issue I see with our E-Bags, is that we (most of us) feel like we can handle it; It is our burden; etc. I have slowly learned to turn it over to God. But, it hasn't been easy.

Response by SCPO Larry Knight Sr. made Nov 23 at 2014 10:39 PM

2014-11-23T22:39:20-05:00

Well that's a pretty dam good depiction of myself after all the BS in Vietnam, and the after effects. The Divorce, loosing my kid's to the bitch and now having to give her 50% of my retainer until she __ __ __ __ ing dies. So how do you just turn off the switch, I'm unable to this date and have gone to the Va etc. I don't do pill's and the therapy doesn't do a dam thing for me but piss me off.

Response by MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca made Nov 24 at 2014 7:23 AM

2014-11-24T07:23:17-05:00

I always physically packed heavy - no one could ever accuse me of not having something when THEY needed it.

Emotionally - the seams on my duffle bag were/are always ready to burst. I am an emotional person to begin with, I wear them on my sleeve. Its never a surprise to anyone how I'm feeling. Throw in a long deployment, 2 of 3 children with special needs, my health issues, my wife's health issues, near death experiences, aging parents and you have a lot of baggage. I've been fortunate to have found some great counselors and have a supporting spouse all these years to help me "unpack" I think the toughest spells I went through were

1) Being in the hospital for 2 months after a misdiagnosed condition and surgery and the ensuing months of recovery. Took a long time to accept psychotropic drugs as part of the solution.

2) About 2 months after I came home from Iraq when everything kind of sunk in. My wife and I went through a few mounts of couples counseling to readjust and move forward

3) This past year with 2 of my 3 kids breaking limbs, my daughter contacting and still trying to shake the ITP virus and losing my job and all the surrounding turmoil.