How do you handle the difficulty of explaining to your family what you do in the military?

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 00:44:59 -0400

I have a lot of prior servicemen in my family. I am as far as I know the first officer and definitely the first to serve in the medical service corps. I tried explaining how !y BOLC got delayed (which is out of my hands but still pisses me off.) they seem to look at me like I have 2 heads . I have risen to and overcame every challenge the military has thrown at me to date, but I feel like some of them kinda look down on me. I am proud of my service to my country and if it was up to me I would be done with my training. As luck would have it I am moving to a new unit that is more on the ball and I will get my training over with an hopefully get some deployments. I usually don't let this kind of stuff bother me. But since it is family an these were people I used to look to for guidance, I really want to be civil. Has anybody out there ever dealt with a situation like this. If so, any suggestions?

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 7 at 2016 12:59 AM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 00:59:44 -0400

If you know your doing your best, you don't have to prove anything else to anyone. You shouldn't have to explain that your at the mercy of the system, almost everyone who has served has struggled with bureaucracy at some point. I suspect most of them are proud of you, but unsure how or even if they should articulate it.

Response by ENS Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 7 at 2016 1:02 AM

ENS Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 01:02:28 -0400

Unless someone has walked in your shoes, they probably will not understand the struggles you have went through. The medical community is unique in and of itself. It is not a community where you can click though some online course and sign a certificate. You are not dealing with equipment, you are dealing with people. A mistake can cost people their life. Training in the medical community takes time and 100% focus and dedication. No off days. It's hard to explain, but perhaps making it relatable will help. Hopefully things start picking up for you!

Response by SFC A.M. Drake made Sep 7 at 2016 4:58 AM

SFC A.M. Drake — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 04:58:17 -0400

Yes...family is the harshest critics. It's a no win situation best you can do is give the standard "name, rank and serial number"; also they are probably jealous in some aspects, since you raised the bar by becoming an "O".

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 7 at 2016 9:43 AM

MSG Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 09:43:07 -0400

I'm a Health Inspector for the Army. Not really too hard to explain that one......unless people really want to delve into the science of it.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 7 at 2016 3:09 PM

MAJ Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 15:09:27 -0400

LT,
My my first question would be are you a reservist or an active duty member. Additionally are the members of your family reservist or active duty members. The reason I ask is that this has a lot to do with the way your family members look at you. As a reservist I speak from experience when I say that the active duty component looks down on us especially if we are in a medical AOC or MOS. In dealing with your family members it is important for them to understand that the reserve component works very differently from the active duty component and relies on funding that is cyclical. If your BOLC class was scheduled later in the fiscal year funding for it may have been suspended due to budgetary constraints. All in all I would not worry about it, you wear the uniform and are part of the 1.5% who choose to do so.
CPT Cotton

Response by Cpl Justin Goolsby made Sep 7 at 2016 4:36 PM

Cpl Justin Goolsby — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 16:36:22 -0400

I don't. They know I'm a Marine and that's sufficient. The way I see it, the less people know about my job, the better. Even though I have a simple job, I'm very opsec minded because even the littlest detail could be used against us and the mission at hand.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 7 at 2016 6:28 PM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 18:28:30 -0400

Its funny how my dream of serving evolved since reading about General Custer a a kid. When I graduated high school all I thought I was good for was shooting a gun( I was 18 and didn't know a lot about the military). Then after being urgedcto go college, the plan was to enlist. But I was 100lb plus overweight. Finally I got the motivation to lose the weight into the form of my now wife. Then when the chance to serve came I took it. I still get to train in soldiers skills but I can also advance my civilian career. In the end its been a hard road but I wouldn't change it because it made me alot stronger. And now I get to serve my country which is the most important thing of all. Thanks everybody for the advice and encouragement.

Response by Capt Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 8 at 2016 11:42 AM

Capt Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 08 Sep 2016 11:42:32 -0400

For many years, my job just was not talked about outside of the workplace. Say nothing and there can be no problems.

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 12 at 2016 6:06 PM

LTC Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 12 Sep 2016 18:06:39 -0400

Welcome the Army, where things never go as planned! The BOLC delay is actually part of your training. You just didn't know it yet. The Army is teaching you to be flexible and adaptable. It's easy to handle things that happen as expected. The challenge is handling issues to aren't expected. Seriously, though. If you're family looks down on you because BOLC is delayed, then that's their issue. Really, if they're anything but supportive, then it's time to focus on the task at hand and not worry what your family thinks. I hope you didn't accept a commission to make your family proud. That's a sure set up for disappointment if they don't react as you hope. Rather, I hope you accepted a commission as that's what you wanted to do in service of your country and your self. If that's the case, then you'll be fine. As far as explaining what you do, a basic job description should suffice. See if you can put it in civilian terms that would make sense to them.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 12 at 2016 10:16 PM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 12 Sep 2016 22:16:00 -0400

You can tell them that, as a MSC Officer, you handle the administrative and command functions of the Medical Corps whether it be in a line unit like an ASMC or a hospital. Or just keep silent; I gave up trying to explain what I do a long time ago.