How do you deal with survivor grief?

CH (CPT) Heather Davis — Wed, 18 Jun 2014 16:08:52 -0400

As a Chaplain recognizes that many of our Soldiers are dealing with guilt and shame. I am asking for your input in helping our fellow brother's and sisters to conceptualize their pain.

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 18 at 2014 4:14 PM

1SG Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 18 Jun 2014 16:14:51 -0400

That's a tough one Chaplain Davis. Me personally I fully believe that when it is your time, it is your time. I have lost many brothers in arms while deployed. Our BN alone lost 35 Soldiers during my second deployment.

Response by MSG Floyd Williams made Jun 18 at 2014 4:34 PM

MSG Floyd Williams — Wed, 18 Jun 2014 16:34:39 -0400

It will take faith and prayers along with a circle of family and friends to be a strong support group to help the person to cope and overcome the grief in addition to professional counseling.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 18 at 2014 4:47 PM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 18 Jun 2014 16:47:06 -0400

I think everyone deals with this in separate ways. As leadership we have to be an open ear and sometimes a shoulder to lean on. Be open to our soldiers and let them know that they have someone to look too. As always suicide is NOT an option, that's why we need to be available 24/7.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 18 at 2014 4:50 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 18 Jun 2014 16:50:10 -0400

As the former Brigade Senior Medic for my old Unit, my phone still rings at all hours from folks that need an ear. I think the most important thing is to listen to what they are saying as well as what they aren't.

Response by MSG Wade Huffman made Jun 18 at 2014 4:53 PM

MSG Wade Huffman — Wed, 18 Jun 2014 16:53:04 -0400

Ma'am, the most tragic cases that I have personally witnessed involved wide 'swings' ranging from denial, 'self medication' (alcohol and other drugs) and avoidance of those with whom they (were) close, to include spouses and other family members.

I realize this may be the extreme end of the spectrum (at least I hope so) and I hope you and others like you will be able to intervene effectively prior to this.

Response by SSG David Hollingshead made Jun 18 at 2014 7:33 PM

SSG David Hollingshead — Wed, 18 Jun 2014 19:33:59 -0400

In my 21 years i have Lost more "friends" than i really want to remember. what i do is Continue to serve being the best Soldier i can be because i know that the y will kick my butt if i dont.

Response by SP5 Laurie Mixter made May 28 at 2023 12:20 PM

SP5 Laurie Mixter — Sun, 28 May 2023 12:20:15 -0400

Chaplain, I was in Iraq, and I made friends with a bunch of Army truck drivers. I used to talk and visit with them, I would come over some time and they would go out on the road and fewer and fewer of them came back! (Eventualey no one did) I found out they had died, the ones that survived went back to the States! I felt bad for them til I went there myself, Friendly Fire! You are alive for a reason, find out why, I did! I started to fight for Veterans' rights and animal rights, using the tools God has given me and you!