Do you feel some semblance of emptiness?

2015-12-03T15:40:38-05:00

I drank my cup of coffee this morning and enjoyed one of three cigarettes for the day. The sun was bright and it caused a chain of thoughts that describes my problem. I wake up to the sun and go to bed when it is dark. My journey entails lifting weights, blogging, eating, and cleaning every day. Nothing more, nothing less. It is a passage devoid of excitement and passion. I feel like I need an intellectual exercise to determine a better azimuth. I am sure I have connectivity with some fellow RP members because we are on the same wavelength.

Response by SGT David T. made Dec 3 at 2015 3:47 PM

2015-12-03T15:47:29-05:00

I feel like this sometimes too. Then I see one of the awesome sunsets or capture an amazing space image like these I took: http://www.astrobin.com/users/Telum/ and I am filled with wonder again. I guess I just try and find things to fill my life. I survived 3 deployments so I figure it's best that I live a little bit lol

David's gallery | AstroBin

AstroBin is an image hosting website specifically targeted to astrophotographers: it's the first and the last place where you need to upload your astrophotography images. Made by an astrophotographer, for the astrophotographers.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 3 at 2015 3:53 PM

2015-12-03T15:53:50-05:00

You have to break out of that cycle. You have to try to do new things or refine your way of thinking. Life is certainly too short not to have a passion in your life. Sometimes the journey to find the often elusive thing is what makes us who we are.

Response by SSgt Terry P. made Dec 3 at 2015 4:23 PM

2015-12-03T16:23:00-05:00

MAJ Ken Landgren "Sometimes it feels like I am trying to light a fire that will not burn."
I feel the same at times. Just like you ,i keep trying ,it must be in our nature.

Response by CSM Charles Hayden made Dec 3 at 2015 4:51 PM

2015-12-03T16:51:29-05:00

MAJ Ken Landgren Did I miss the part about giving to others?

Response by PO1 William "Chip" Nagel made Dec 3 at 2015 5:16 PM

2015-12-03T17:16:38-05:00

I am glad that you know that we are here and always ready to chew the Fat. I haven't had the issues with Depression that I once had (I strongly suspect that I might be Asperger Syndrome and that might have something to do with it). I guess finding your "Thing" is good and probably my saving grace. I love Gardening and Tending to indoor and outdoor plants. I love Fishing. I still do some Photography although I no longer have Several Thousand $ worth of Equipment and I have Several On-Line Forums that I am active on (Last time I checked I have over 5,000 followers and 3 On-Line News Service use my postings to determine what is "Hot" in the Liberal Community)

Response by SN Greg Wright made Dec 3 at 2015 11:33 PM

2015-12-03T23:33:59-05:00

MAJ Ken Landgren Major, you've pretty much hit my situation on the head, so I completely get where you're coming from. This is why I shake my head at people who think that vets who come here are just looking for points. Speaking for myself, I come here because it is, sadly, one of the best escapes I have from my own head.

Having said that, you sound like you may be depressed. I really, really hope you examine this statement to see if it applies to you, and if so, do something about it, even if it's just to talk to someone here, or wherever your favorite haunt is.

Response by Cpl Jeff N. made Dec 4 at 2015 6:25 AM

2015-12-04T06:25:27-05:00

MAJ Ken Landgren . You need to find an occupation of some sort. I am not sure if that is every day for you or just a day off etc. If that is your every day, you need to break that cycle. An occupation needn't even be a paying job, just something to give you perspective and contact with others. Clearly I don't know what you have going on in your world but a non stop sense of emptiness and melancholy is not good for the soul.

Response by LCDR Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 4 at 2015 11:27 AM

2015-12-04T11:27:32-05:00

Ken-For about the first two years after I left AD, I didn't really "leave" in my mind. I wore a "high and tight", worked out every day, and lived in anticipation of that moment when the Navy would realize I was worth calling back in for "another round".

About the third year, it struck me that I was indeed..."out".

It took another two years to balance that in my heart and soul; to accept that where one mission ended, another was just beginning. This time, it wasn't about being defined by a larger organization's standards...but my own.

Eventually, that was quite liberating. I realized that in my civilian life, I was becoming more valuable to others than I ever had in uniform. Where I led, it was owing to my skills...not my rank. Where I stood out...it became personal. When I failed...I had every right to get back in the saddle-no NAVPERS permission required.

Then, when I least expected it, a move to build my own "fortress of solitude" resulted in gaining a new home town, new friends, and the love of my life. Without even thinking, I ended up becoming involved in this group...heading up this board...acting on behalf of this committee-Sometimes, things are just easiest when we let them happen.

One thing that get's down-played in all our discussions is how much we who served "stand out" against our peers. We did a great deal, very early in life. We're attracted to challenges...are capable of immense discipline...these things only magnify in effect "out here".

For myself, part of the process of getting to that point was, as you suggest, finding a mental challenge...I started researching one of the biggest historical mysteries of the 20th century, and tried to "solve" it. After three years, I did. No, History Channel isn't going to run a special on it...no, I'm probably never going to get the 700 page book I wrote about it completed, let alone published...but it gave me a battlefield to face my demons on.

Keep the faith, Brother...you know where to find me.

Response by PO2 Robin Hall made May 14 at 2023 10:51 PM

2023-05-14T22:51:32-04:00

Every single day, I feel the emptiness.

Response by A1C Medrick "Rick" DeVaney made May 16 at 2023 12:36 AM

2023-05-16T00:36:40-04:00

Step Outside Of That Box You've Created For Yourself.
Try Something Else, If For No Other Reason Than "Oh What The Hell, Why Not"?
Anything, Makes Little To No Difference. Just Get Off Your Azz And DO It.
As I Was Told As A 14 - 15 Year Old Kid, Living With My Brother Overseas,
"Never Say 'NO' To Anything If It WON'T Kill You Immediately..
IF You Do, You May Very Well Be Missing The Adventures Of A Lifetime"
And I KNOW It's True... I Learned It Then And I'm Still Alive At 79 ~
It's Been One Hell Of a Ride... Make It A Point To Intentionally Ask Others,
"What Do You Do For Fun " ~ Then Give It A Shot.... Real Life Is To Be LIVED,
Not Just Screwed Away....... Ever Said To Yourself "That Looks Like Fun, Maybe I'll Try It"?
Remove The Word "Maybe", And GO FOR IT !!...
Really, Why Would You Sit On Your Azz And Do Nothing?... Don't Waste Your Life; This MAY Be The Only One You've Had Or Will Have After This. Then Again, There Also May Be More To Come... "YES".!
I Don't Know For Sure; But If I CAN, I'm Coming Back And Doing This Bitch ALL OVER Again.!
.
As JOHN LENNON Stated : "Life Is What Happens To You While You're Making Other Plans".
I Have Some NEWS For JOHN, I Don't Have TIME To Make Other Plans. I Didn't Plan This One Either,
I'm Too Damned Busy LIVING It.,
SERIOUSLY, I Do NOT Understand Why People Don't Take More Chances In Life...
There IS No Adventure Otherwise. ...And Without Adventures & Unusual Things Happening;
What's Been Done WORTH Remembering.?. Besides, We NEED To Lose Once In Awhile; Without Losing, How'd We Know What It's Like To Win?.... Same With Success... Before I Made Good Money In Business I Had 3 In A Row Fall On Their Azz.....Then Success Came In, And It Was Like:
"HOLY SH*T, So THIS Is What It's Like"!! .
.Ya WIN ~ Ya LOSE, But Most Of All Ya LIVE....

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made May 16 at 2023 1:59 AM

2023-05-16T01:59:46-04:00

7 years have transpired and life and perspectives have changed sometimes due to forces out of my control and sometimes because I willed the changes. Perhaps I will expound on the deltas from seven years ago to now and what brought about the changes. Maybe some of you can learn from my journey in life. Maybe not. We will see.

Response by SSG Dennis R. made May 16 at 2023 7:38 PM

2023-05-16T19:38:51-04:00

I'm not going to post my phone # here, but if you send me a message, you can have it.
My time is completely my own. No wife, no kids, no relatives within 1000 miles. I don't keep to any particular schedule.
My late wife was fond of saying " ... he never met a stranger ... ".

Response by SPC Colin Ahasay made May 17 at 2023 2:39 AM

2023-05-17T02:39:38-04:00

I'll give pragmatist advice, you sure the compass isn't broken? Magnetic north and grid north often differ.

You asked me one time recently if I knew what I could do to make the world better, maybe you have a similar quandary in life.