Depression and mental illness; what can I do when it's affecting me? I've already tried my unit, IG, and JAG.

SPC Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 20 Nov 2014 12:46:31 -0500

I have been going through a really bad time with my unit. Up PCSd here back in March and back then I had a mild case of depression.
Since I have got here I have been humiliated in front of my peers. I have been called names. And I have been told that I don't deserve to wear this uniform.
I have been told by medical professionals the because my depression has gotten so bad that it is pushing into personality disorder. I was also told that because of my illness, it has caused me to accrue a few articles.
This unit has been aware of my illness when I first got here, but has not done anything about it. I do everything they ask, but I still get treated bad. IG has been no help, neither has JAG. I just don't know where to turn anymore.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Nov 20 at 2014 1:25 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 20 Nov 2014 13:25:47 -0500

You mentioned that you talked to IG and JAG, but have you talked to your chain of command? Have you given them a chance to help you with your issues?

Response by CSM Private RallyPoint Member made Nov 21 at 2014 1:03 PM

CSM Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 21 Nov 2014 13:03:48 -0500

You need to go see your Chaplain; they are a good resource and will help guide you in the right direction. Regardless of your spirituality, they are there to help.

Response by CSM Private RallyPoint Member made Nov 28 at 2014 8:21 PM

CSM Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 28 Nov 2014 20:21:03 -0500

SPC, first off, it's unfortunate that you suffer from these issues, I truly wish you the best best in your health. But, to answer your question, I think you need to look inward and ask yourself, what do you truly want for yourself. I say this because I truly think that there are two types of Soldiers: 1) Soldiers that are bad for the Army (those that get DUIs, commit crimes, etc). 2) Soldiers that the Army is bad for them (Soldiers that are naturally not physically strong athletic, naturally battle weigh issues and a profession like the Army isn't really the place for them). Not knowing the background of your situation, you have to ask yourself under your current medical condition, is it best for your long term health to continue service. I am in no way dismissive of your CoC alleged blind-eye to your condition. They should be in your corner every step of the way assisting you in recovery. However, your health must be your first priority. Talk to your doctors about the effect of continued service on your mental health, weight the risks vs rewards and make the decision on whether a med-board is the best option. The very nature of the Army profession is to bring various positive/negative stressors on Soldiers IOT ready them from wartime OPTEMPO. Could you sustain? Would years of Army life make it worse--these are the questions you have ask yourself. Even though it's not right, we can't promise you that anywhere you go you won't run into insensitive leadership towards your issues. It's just a reality. You have protect yourself first--the Army was here before you and I and it will be here long after. Don't risk long term damage to yourself. Good luck.

Response by CPT Richard Riley made Nov 28 at 2014 8:46 PM

CPT Richard Riley — Fri, 28 Nov 2014 20:46:14 -0500

The chaplain is a good first start. That should be a good place to begin to sort out what you need to do & how you take your next steps. The chaplain should also be able to help you communicate properly with your chain of command. Communication is an important piece to this puzzle that needs to stay honest & up front.
Keep in touch through this discussion & take things one step at a time. Breath and do all you can to keep a clear head on your shoulders.

Response by SFC Mark Merino made Nov 28 at 2014 10:44 PM

SFC Mark Merino — Fri, 28 Nov 2014 22:44:20 -0500

Depression keeps your mind so clogged with worry that we rarely do things textbook GI Joe. The late nights of stress and insomnia make us late fr formation and not really able to contribute to the fight like we want to. I'm not seeing a lot of talk about what you have done within your C of C. I beg you to do that before you bring in any outside resources. Even if you have a problem within your own C of C (if you have gone past TM/SQD LDR, PSG, 1SG, CDR already) then Chaplain. Never go to outside resurces without doing everything to keep it in house first. Your leadership neds to be aware that your problems continue, and nothing has been resolved. Chaplains aren't just good for the spiritual stuff. They are wired in to everybody from medical to mental health. Keep us in the loop.

Response by SSG Robert Burns made Nov 28 at 2014 10:50 PM

SSG Robert Burns — Fri, 28 Nov 2014 22:50:22 -0500

Who have you talked to in your unit?

Response by CSM Charles Hayden made Nov 28 at 2014 11:34 PM

CSM Charles Hayden — Fri, 28 Nov 2014 23:34:14 -0500

SPC KRORC, Please ask a medical doctor about, "Dilantin/ aka Phenytoin". The CEO of Dreyfus Mutual Funds, Jack Dreyfus, wrote a book about how Dilantin helped him in one night! Mr Deryfus spoke to 2 Ea US Presidents about the positive effects of the drug. The FDA had no interest in investigating the possible positive effects on depression patients as the drug companies would not realize their typically huge profits in testing the drug for possible helping depression patients.

Response by TSgt Kristin Parsons made Nov 28 at 2014 11:59 PM

TSgt Kristin Parsons — Fri, 28 Nov 2014 23:59:40 -0500

SPC Kotrc, the good news is you are in a good place to get help. SA has many mental health clinics/hospitals that can help you. I kind of know what you're dealing with. I'm in the middle of a med board myself and have/still am receiving treatment. I can talk with you more in depth if you would like.

Response by Maj Private RallyPoint Member made Nov 29 at 2014 12:24 AM

Maj Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 29 Nov 2014 00:24:20 -0500

A lot of good responses thus far. Here's an AF article: http://www.jble.af.mil/news/story.asp?id=123428614

I cannot advocate one way or the other, but generally I think it would be helpful to surround yourself with more encouraging people. "This unit" doesn't necessarily mean everyone knows you may be battling with something.

Most importantly, those humiliating you and calling names cannot possibly prescribe to Army values. Know in your core that it is against the values of many of the silent bystanders.

I'm impressed by the response on this social network and I think it is brave to ask for help. I recommend the chaplain as well, even if you aren't religious. They are expert listeners. Also, talk to a friend. Ask them just to listen, even if you only talk about non-related stuff. Ensure to ask this as a friend to set their expectation that you need help and listening is what you need from them.

Lastly, reading my post, I've been fairly directive. You need to make the decision. Please know this is my advice based on your short description. I cannot fathom everything you've gone through so I emphasize to find someone, a confidante to confide the details to better help you.

Thank you again for asking for help.

Commentary - Two months ago, I wanted to die

Editor's Note: The following commentary was written in observance of Depression Awareness Month. Two months ago, I wanted to die. Allow me to clarify - I was not suicidal on that dark, August night when I hit rock bottom. I did not want to take a razor

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Nov 29 at 2014 12:32 AM

SPC Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 29 Nov 2014 00:32:55 -0500

Up till now, I have talked to IG, jag, the Chaplin and anyone that will listen. The major problem is that with my depression I have a hard time focusing, concentrating, and even making decisions. It is like I am in a dream state. I can see what is happening but I can not control anything. When I tried to explain this to the chain of command, it seemed like they didn't care. And now I am facing a third article 15

Response by LTC Dr Richard Wasserman, LTC (R) made Nov 29 at 2014 12:40 AM

LTC Dr Richard Wasserman, LTC (R) — Sat, 29 Nov 2014 00:40:49 -0500

Start with the Chaplain. They are usually great. If your unit's doesn't help--go to the post chaplain.

Response by SN Maureen McClain made Nov 29 at 2014 1:14 AM

SN Maureen McClain — Sat, 29 Nov 2014 01:14:04 -0500

there is an article call disability harrassment, retaliation and discipline. Three emerging ADA Issues. Please google this. The conduct you discribe Is actionable as disability harrassment. You need to decide for yourself what you want to happen. After you do a little research seek outside advice. It is unconscionable that the forces we depend on to protect our rights at the same time use military justice to ignore them.
M

Response by SCPO Ralph Hensley made Nov 29 at 2014 9:48 AM

SCPO Ralph Hensley — Sat, 29 Nov 2014 09:48:35 -0500

I'm not a psychologist and am not trained to give you anything more than the advice of a senior enlisted leader who shares concerns for those enlisted and junior officers entrusted to his care and development. My advice is laid out in several responses but the number 1 recommendation is to get a grip on your reality and seek professional help from a qualified counselor/psychiatrist. There's no shame in seeking assistance. It's for your own good and to protect your rights and benefits. I'll be watching your progress through Rallypoint.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Nov 30 at 2014 10:48 PM

MAJ Private RallyPoint Member — Sun, 30 Nov 2014 22:48:52 -0500

Call Military One Source. I have used them personally for myself, my family members, and have counseled and referred numerous Soldiers over the years. They offer free access to off post, civilian providers in your local area.

They give you an opportunity to get away from the stigma that, right, wrong, or indifferent, is attributed to on post care.

Response by SPC Michelle Rehman made May 30 at 2016 5:37 AM

SPC Michelle Rehman — Mon, 30 May 2016 05:37:56 -0400

Having depression and anxiety is like the room filing with sand while the walls close in