Can I sign up as Reserves and go active after 1 week at basic so that I don’t lose full rights to my son?

Kaylea Stephens — Mon, 14 Dec 2020 19:23:51 -0500

my recruiter is telling me to sign up as reserves and go active after 1 week at air so that I don’t lose full rights to my son can it be don

Response by CW2 Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 14 at 2020 7:40 PM

CW2 Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 14 Dec 2020 19:40:41 -0500

Please slow down and give a better description of what is going on. We don't need to know crazy details, but definitely more than what you have posted.
Don't sign up for Reserves if you want active, don't sign for active if you want Reserve.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 14 at 2020 8:34 PM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 14 Dec 2020 20:34:28 -0500

Don't try and use the military as a means to manipulate and maneuver family custody issues. The military only works for those with unconditional family support (and even that is stressful).

You’re going to find yourself painted in a legal corner with uncooperative military orders and assignments which will leave your legal custody adversary with an advantage. This starts with the Family Care Plan which will be required at your enlistment contract that you square away the custody and care of your child in the event for example you are sent to S. Korea for two years, or deployed in a Combat Zone.

The Army is not interested in smoothing the road bumps in life regarding custody care and family friction.

There was nothing more complicating than a soldier of mine coming to me saying they couldn't attend drill or annual training because of child care issues. It just forces me to push them out of the army by way of not having a Family Care Plan they are abiding by. Then the General doesn't approve the chapter out anyway because they are desperate to hang onto soldiers. So now the army has a soldier that doesn't want to play anymore, and can't get out if they want. Eventually, they just stop showing for years on end and get Chaptered out for non attendance (which is much worse) and force the issue.

Response by Kaylea Stephens made Dec 14 at 2020 9:05 PM

Kaylea Stephens — Mon, 14 Dec 2020 21:05:44 -0500

I am a military child and I have a family care plan for long term and short term. But I am also a single parent. My recruiter says to keep custody of my son and keep all rights I will have to join reserves and while at ait switch to active duty becasue if I join active to start I will have to relinquish all rights to my child and possibly not get him bank until I leave the military.

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 14 at 2020 10:15 PM

MSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 14 Dec 2020 22:15:11 -0500

For one thing don’t listen to a recruiter who thinks he’s an attorney. If you want to go active duty talk to an active duty recruiter not a reserve recruiter. The military doesn’t decide whether you keep your child or not. Talk to a lawyer who specializes in parental rights and the military for guidance. Good luck.

Response by TSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 14 at 2020 10:59 PM

TSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 14 Dec 2020 22:59:35 -0500

A couple of points.

1. When I was on active duty I had someone in a position that was similar to yours. It was a nightmare for all parties(including me). He came within inches of getting kicked out because he could not handle the stress of being on active duty and having to fight for custody.

2. Very rarely if ever believe a recruiter about anything other than getting you into the military.

3. I have spent time on active duty and Guard. Both have family stress and what is an advantage for one is a disadvantage to the other. I am in a unit that really does not deploy but we have many other missions we have to handle and many are short-term short notice things, where on active duty you tend to know that deployment that is 9 months away that you can plan for.

4. You sign a contract and your contract says X. I can't speak for the Army, but in the Navy only when you volunteer to go Subs, Nuke, or SEAL in Bootcamp will your contract change. I have never heard of anyone changing from reserves/guard to active except under very special circumstances.

5. What is your Goal? To be active duty and serve full-time for 4-6 years or 20? Or to be a weekend warrior and have a civilian job for 90% of the time and be with your family? These are very important questions only you can answer.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 14 at 2020 11:08 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 14 Dec 2020 23:08:15 -0500

You definitely cannot just "go active" while in AIT. The Reserves have you until you are released. There are some rules about giving up custody of your kids to join the Army on active duty if you're a single parent. Most people who do that just get their kids once they're settled into their new unit

Response by SSgt Christophe Murphy made Dec 15 at 2020 1:15 AM

SSgt Christophe Murphy — Tue, 15 Dec 2020 01:15:34 -0500

I understand that you are trying to game the system to potentially solve a problem but you need to step back and look at all of your options.

You need to look at going reserve, guard or AD as semi permanent for the immediate future. You are gambling a long term scenario to fix a problem. What happens if you go active? What happens if you go reserve? What happens if the word gets out you are volunteering for activation for the optics? Actions all have opposite or equal reactions. You need to seriously evaluate your options and also consider the fact that you have a slim chance of getting activated while still at AIT.

Response by MAJ Javier Rivera made Dec 15 at 2020 6:58 AM

MAJ Javier Rivera — Tue, 15 Dec 2020 06:58:45 -0500

No, you cannot go from one component to another just like that! Do not, let me repeat this, DO NOT!!!! sign any contract under such pretenses.

Few things...

1. Do not join the military without sorting your family issues first. You don’t want to add more stress to yourself.
2. Regarding Reserves and Active Component. You need a release signed by a General Officer (or authorized delegate). Not going to happen! Even worst for National Guard.
3. If you are truly set in joining the service, like previously stated: work your personal affairs and get with a different recruiter since the one you are talking is definitely setting you up for failure.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 15 at 2020 12:14 PM

MAJ Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 15 Dec 2020 12:14:26 -0500

No, you cannot change your contract a week into training. Once you sign, you are agreeing to X amount of years for that branch of service.
If you want to go active, you need to see an active recruiter and sign an active duty contract. The military cannot take your rights to your son away. Yes, you may have to appoint a guardian while you are at training or something similar to ensure he is properly cared for and you will always need to have a plan in place for when you are called away for training.