How to help a soldier with a family care plan or IRR packet?

Is she required to have a FCP? Doesn't sound like a FCP in itself is going to help the family. If the problem is child care by itself you may be able to ask around and see if a spouse in the unit can babysit.
6 months of not showing up - was she excused (code A) or counted as unsatisfactory participant (code U)? After 9 U's the commander is required to initate seperation.
If she is not an unsatisfactory participant, you can assist with initating a request for voluntary transfer to IRR. If she has not completed her TPU obligation, she will have to get recommended approval at all levels of the chain of command. Depending on her status would determine what packet to submit (T-1-A-7, IRR for unsatisfactory participation, can be done by unit without SM;T-1-A-1, Vol IRR request, requires Soldier's signature). The packets consist of DA 4651, DA 4856 (by commander and retention), Soldier's justification/supporting documents.
If she is having mental health issues, then maybe the commander should have her evaluated "fit for duty". A doctor should determine if she is stable to continue to serve. This could result in a medical discharge.

Here is the deal. The 1SG is putting work on you that the Command Team needs to do. You do not initiate Chapter Packet. Nor do you initiate a Family Care Plan. The SM that needs the FCP needs to work with the Command Team. Same with an IRR packet. The SM needs to make contact with Retention AND Commander to create/submit the IRR packet.

So we are talking about 20+ consecutive U's here?

As mentioned 9 can potentially set off the packet submission requirement form the Company Commander. I have personally seen instructions from higher to hold all packets until 27 U's are reached, but that's the General's authority to pull that lever. I had to make sure the packet was in the cue at 9 in the event the CG's baseline changed.

The solution is showing up to drill PERIOD. FCP and IRR are not going to solve the execution of showing up to drill.

I'll just say it. The Command Team and S1 shop are behind the ball. I have to think the commander has to be accountable to the high count U soldiers to the BN and BDE, etc..... Because if the CG is trying to cut dead weight across the board, and the company level packets hadn't been lining their ducks up with all the U's and council statements that support it there can be a big problem when trying to clear the books.

Then the unit is stuck with non preforming soldiers on the books that could otherwise be gone with a single signature.

Get the packet done............ save your commander's ass..............

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I will say this............. it's frustrating to see young soldiers enter the USAR when they are trying to get a leg up in life right out of the nest, and then find themselves challenged with the uncompromising requirement of USAR service and just trying to survive in the civilian world entirely on their own.

TRADOC can be a welcome break from civilian obligations, but they always come back after graduation from AIT.

I wish there was more of a vetting for new USAR recruits and what that actually means to fit into their civilian obligations and what they will actually be tasked with in the USAR and specifically to the units they are assigned.

I say this because one can get slammed really hard with USAR obligations as a PFC and derail education timelines when they do not have the leverage in life to make things fit better, or find themselves in a cushy position that can fit their civilian obligations with check the box promotional opportunities.

It is mostly a roll of the dice, and certainly from a new recruit's perspective who is going in to the system blind and no more information than what is pushed as 1 weekend a month 2 weeks a year, and the MOS job description on GoArmy.com