Satire Response to Civilian Clothing policies

So after not be allowed to go into the Schofield Barracks Commissary a few weeks ago due to wearing slightly factory 'frayed' shorts (not ripped, torn, etc). I have determined that there is a very loose interpretation of the Civilian Clothing policies, giving me the opinion that it’s completely at the courtesy patrol's discretion aka "I'll uphold the policy on whomever I want, but my friends can surely go in dressed inappropriately." My closet is filled with clothing bought at the military exchange and I have come to the determination that my clothing will probably never be acceptable. In other words, it is sold by the military exchange and has factory frayed, cut-off/ripped edges as done to nearly all clothes sold to women my age. To assure you I am not lying, I went to the Army Exchange website and pulled off a few examples of women's shorts on there (see picture). While this policy does not affect me much because I hardly ever shop at the commissary (I seldom cook), I know it does affect some families and cause unnecessary stress. (NOTE: The examples given and posted around post do not match what the policy actually states! Legal deniability?)

I not so secretly want to make a bunch of posters of a variety of satire (and possibly true) reponses concerning these policies, and put them all over base. But I won’t. However, I’m sorry if this post entices someone to do something in this regards. Anyways while I was brainstorming my mental rebellion, I came up with some reponses that I thought I would share.
1. “Was not allowed in the PX wearing clothes I bought at the PX…”
2. “(Soldier) now buys clothes off amazon in order to enter the PX to buy clothes to wear in the PX”
3. “I have not had a home cooked meal in months due to not being allowed in the commissary…been eating at Popeye’s and gained 30lbs”
4. (Based off #3) “Help fight American Obesity, rescind Military Civilian Clothing policies!”
5. “Couldn’t buy the new APFT uniform, my money was spent on ‘appropriate’ clothing so my wife could go shopping”
6. “I can’t go in! Why? It’s not my fault! My dog chewed holes in them!”
7. CP: “Ma’am, you can’t come in your child’s clothing is dirty”
Mother “My son is 6-months old…he drools...”


Anyone have something to add to this list?

And on a more serious note, should we be concerned about the effect these policies are having on military families? What can be done when you are denied entry when dressed appropriately?